Improving Life by Keeping It Simple

I was in a study the other night where the discussion was about keeping our eyes on the finish line of hopes in our lives. In reality, reaching for what we really want in life is part of keeping a focus on the end goal but we discussed in our group, how too often we get off track looking at the sidelines of life which distracts us. A little book, Keep It Simple: Unclutter Your Mind to Uncomplicate Your Life by Joe Calloway gives insights on keeping your mind focused on what is important. It can be ordered through Simple Truths.

Joe Calloway is Executive In Residence at Belmont University’s Center For Entrepreneurship. He helps organizations and businesses improve by leadership development and team improvement. He is an author as well of numerous business books on helping companies be the best they can be. In the small book Keep It Simple he is focusing in on individual self-improvement.

A major problem in our lives is that they become cluttered by the unimportant stuff of life so we never get around to what is important. How many times have you heard yourself say, “I will get around to it one day”. Then life passes by and we never get around to what we felt was so important.

He emphasizes to spend most of life energy in keeping it simple. Create your life goals in a simple and easy to understand manner. Take some time to quiet your life and think over the 3 most important things in your life. “Our life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify, simplify! I saw let your affairs be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand; instead of a million, count half a dozen, and keep your accounts on your thumbnail.” (Henry David Thoreau). Create your goals you want to accomplish based on the few important things in your life. This reminds me of how Stephen Covey used to say focus in on the “Big Rocks” in your life. Most of your energy should be towards what is most important to you.

Another important point he brings up is in cleaning out the clutter of your life create a “to let go of” list. Time mangers encourage “to do” lists but the “to let go of” list is to help unclutter the distractions that are keeping your eyes on the sidelines instead of the goal line. Examples of the let go’s are negative habits that are getting us off track.

He gives a number of principles to follow and for me the one that stood out to me was “Be better tomorrow than you were today”. I like that principle as it reminds as we keep a clear focus on the important goals they can be reached better if we keep improving ourselves. He gives other principles that are just as noteworthy so I would encourage you to find a copy of the book through your local library or favorite bookseller. Keeping it simple frees up life energy to make the most of your life.

Reflection: What are the 3 most important things in your life? What is cluttering your life that you need to get rid of? How can you simplify your life?

Growth Reminders From The 7 Habits

A friend sent me an email just the other day, wondering if I was alright since I had not posted a blog since mid-November. The ongoing saga of trying to complete my PhD Comps Exam has continued to wear me out but I am not down and out yet. A timely help of mental refreshment came in the form of a training workshop for my work as an adjunct professor for the Alamo Colleges in San Antonio. I had the privilege for the past two Saturdays to do all day training on the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People based on the philosophy of Stephen R. Covey.

The two trainers from the Alamo Colleges made the trainings an enjoyable time due to their passion for the 7 Habits and their passion for instruction. It is always uplifting to see people doing what they love.

The 7 habits of highly effective people are as follows:

1 - Be Proactive
2 - Begin with the End in Mind
3 - Put First Things First
4 - Think Win-Win
5 - Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood
6 – Synergize
7 - Sharpen the Saw

As I reflect on the training time, my favorites of the habits are 1 and 7. Of course to be the best you can in habit 7 you need to be establishing habits 1-6 in your life. There are principles behind each habit that help us in living the best life possible and being the best we can be. Covey’s writings were one inspiration behind my book, Living More Than OK, as in that book my desire is for people to live the best life possible of abundant living.

In this blogpost I will share some of the reasons I find inspiration from my favorites of the habits; starting off with the habit 1 theme of “be proactive” which is the habit of choice. The principle behind this theme is, “I am free to choose and am responsible for my choices.” (Stephen Covey). We have unlimited opportunities when we understand that we are not victims but have the ability to make choices for the good in our lives. Too many people have bought into the myth that we are mere animals that respond to the stimuli around us and we can’t help the negativity that comes into our lives. We are victims the lies tell us. The first habit principle awakens us to the reality that within each stimulus that touches our lives we have the freedom to choose how to respond.

For example within this principle there is the concept “carry your own weather”. On cloudy days or rainy days it is easy to fall into the stimulus- response trap of being down and sad. But when you carry your own weather you can choose to live like a sunny day on a cloudy day. Choose to carry a smile and cheerful attitude on a cloudy day and see how your response to the day changes. There is power in the freedom to choose to move up from living ok, to Living More Than OK.

Looking at habit 7 the theme is “Sharpen the Saw” the habit of renewal. This habit reminded me of a time I tried to cut tree limbs with an old dull saw. Not very effective. Our lives are not effective either when we do not sharpen the saw. What is the saw in our life? It is -- our life—our inner being. The principle behind this habit is, “To maintain and increase effectiveness, we must renew ourselves in body, heart, mind and soul.” This habit speaks to the important need of lifelong learning and taking care of ourselves in all spheres of our lives: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. To be effective and live an abundant life there is a need to be balanced in each of these spheres of living.

I try to drive home to my college students and in my blog writings here, the importance of our personal choices. Our choices either move us in positive directions or negative ways so we need to choose with wisdom. Then we need to remember to never stop growing so as to stay sharp in responding to all the possibilities and opportunities that come across our life journey.


Reflection: How can you make wise choices in your life? Write down a few ways you can grow in the mental, physical, social/emotional and spiritual spheres of your life.

Numbering Our Days To Reflect On Our Purpose

This past Sunday at the church I attend, as the minister wrapped up his message, he presented a prayer request I had never heard of before. He mentioned that his birthday was coming soon and he was facing a new decade. He was seeking God’s wisdom on what to do in the next decade of his life. He spoke of the biblical phrase to “Number our days” in the context of his life journey. In planning our purposeful direction in our long range goals, it is important to take time to reflect over future time periods.

I appreciated his openness to remind us that it is important to seek prayer from others on our life journey’s direction. As well, we need personal reflection times to look at the long range decades of our lives and the numbering of our days. As soon as I was home at my computer I looked up the Biblical references of “numbering our days.” There were two Psalms with the phrase in them.

Psalm 39:4 "Show me, O LORD, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting is my life.” The emphasis of the Psalm is the reality of how brief our life is. In verse 5 David goes on to say, ”Each man’s life is but a breath.” No matter how long you can hold your breath; a breath is not a long time. David seems to be complaining to God in the text. Commentators on the passage, bring to light that he may be reflecting over the many difficulties in his life; such as his years of being on the run from King Saul even though David was anointed as King. He had to have been heartbroken by also being chased away by his own son, Absalom at one point in time. He had many tragedies and sad hurtful emotions that he took before God. Looking again at the text in verses 2 & 3 , “my anguish increased. My heart grew hot within me”. Here are feelings of anger and anxiety David is experiencing. These feelings are not wrong instead, it is what we do with them. Here he is bringing them to God in prayer. If he lived today he would have been tempted to star in a reality tv show and rage against the injustices in his life. But something tells me being the man after God’s own heart he still would have taken the feelings to God in his quiet time and would reject tv deals. In difficult times and times of regret we often realize how short a time our life journey is. This Psalm is a reminder don’t wait for difficulties to come to take time to reflect on numbering our days.

The other Psalm that has the phrase is Psalm 90:12, “Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” The overall context of this Psalm exalts God’s greatness in His eternal nature versus the brevity of our lives. In this Psalm, David is not looking in anguish at the end of his life. Instead he is seeking God’s wisdom in how to make his life count for God. He wants to understand the time he has left so that he can use it wisely. Wisely for the work God has for him. This is seen in the final verse 17, “May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us—yes, establish the work of our hands.” He repeats the phrase “establish the work of our hands”, so the Psalmist David sees this as an important element of using our time, “our days”, in a wise manner.

Charles Spurgeon in his Treasury of David has this to say about this verse, “A short life should be wisely spent. We have not enough time at our disposal to justify us in misspending a single quarter of an hour. Neither are we sure of enough of life to justify us in procrastinating for a moment. If we were wise in heart we should see this, but mere head wisdom will not guide us aright.” Spurgeon is right. If we look at the emphasis in both passages we see the brevity of life. If our life goes by so quickly and time is one way to honor God, we need to be wise in using the gift of time. At the end of Psalm 90 David is seeking God’s favor, His blessing, for God to establish His work in David. I don’t believe this is speaking only our vocational work even though it is important. In our numbering our days we need to look at all the variety of works God has for us to do and then use our time wisely to honor God in these works.

The idea of numbering our days reminds me of Stephen Covey’s principle of "Begin with the end in mind” As we look into the next year, 5 years or next decade to see where we want to go and accomplish we are visualizing a mind picture or a blue print of what the end results look like. Covey states, “If you don't make a conscious effort to visualize who you are and what you want in life, then you empower other people and circumstances to shape you and your life by default. It's about connecting again with your own uniqueness and then defining the personal, moral, and ethical guidelines within which you can most happily express and fulfill yourself. “ These thoughts line up well with King David’s in Psalm 90 to seek a heart of wisdom to see the work ahead that God has for us.

Reflection: In your own quiet time include a day from time to time to reflect over the numbering of your days. Seek for wisdom in making the most of the time you have for your brief journey here on earth. Have an openness to ask friends to pray for your numbering of days reflection times as the pastor that was mentioned at the beginning did.

Overcoming Time Regrets

Recently in the College Success course I teach I was lecturing on time management. Time management is one issue big in the lives of college students and the rest of us struggle with it too. The sands of time go by too fast and often we would like to do a rewind but that only happens in Hollywood movies. In our race against time we often feel like we are steps behind time or running way behind. As time passes us by we then look back with regrets which is often the basis of our desire to rewind time.

In my teaching I like to use music lyrics to jog the minds of the students to think about issues and life. This semester for time I found a song which I used, “One Day Too Late” by a band called Skillet . Here are the words to the song and as always -- simply click on the title of the song to open up a video of the song to listen to it as you reflect over the words.

One Day Too Late By Skillet

Tick tock hear the clock countdown Wish the minute hand could be rewound
So much to do and so much I need to say Will tomorrow be too late

Feel the moment slip into the past Like sand through an hourglass
In the madness I guess I just forget To do all the things I said

Time passes by Never thought I'd wind up One step behind Now I've made my mind up

Today I'm gonna try a little harder Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget 'Cause we don't have long, gonna make the most of it

Today I'm gonna love my enemies Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place 'Cause tomorrow could be one day too late One day too late One day too late

Tick tock hear my life pass by I can't erase and I can't rewind
Of all the things I regret the most I do... Wish I'd spent more time with you

Here's my chance for a new beginning I saved the best for a better ending
And in the end I'll make it up to you, you'll see You'll get the very best of me

Your time is running out You're never gonna get it back
Make the most of every moment Stop saving the best for last.

There are so many positive take aways from this song. The first thing that stood out to me is, “Never thought I would wind up one step behind.” No one plans to fail or fall behind in their lives. Yet since we are not actively seeking to “make the most of every moment” in wisely using the time God allots us on our journey we subconsciously sabotage all that we could accomplish.

The phrase “gonna make every minute last longer” speaks to the quality of our time. I can’t make a minute last 85 seconds but I can gain more from my time usage by focusing on what Stephen Covey calls the Big Rocks, which are the most important things in my life. For me the Big Rocks are God, family, and the purposes God has placed me on this earth for. These need to be emphasized in my time usage.

Another phrase that stands out to me is “Make a change, make the world a better place”. How can I leave this world a better place? Is sitting around watching reality tv or watching inane videos on the internet helping me make a positive impact on the world around me? In my time usage I need to reflect on ways to improve my little part of the world before the sands of time run out for me. Living life in this fashion cuts down on regrets in how we use our time.

Reflection: Write down some of your thoughts about the song “One Day Too Late” What key thoughts stood out to you? How can you make your time last longer? Think over how can you make you make the world a better place?

Are you on Mission?

One way to help keep a focus on your purpose in life is to develop and compose a Personal Mission Statement. The Personal Mission Statement zeroes in on your core values, principles, and key items you wish to accomplish with your life. In Stephen Covey’s book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People he likens the Mission Statement to that of the Unites States Constitution, the core values of our country.

This Summer I have been going through his son, Sean Covey’s, book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens with my teen daughter. This is a positive book to help teens understand the 7 principles to living life with more purpose and finding more potential in their futures. I have enjoyed this time with my daughter discussing principles which will allow her to have the best life possible. We just finished the chapter where Sean describes the Mission Statement. I like how he brings out that it can be put into various forms of a poem, a song, listing of positive bulleted statements, or a poster to tap into young people’s creativity.

Before working on the Mission Statement there is a need to work on concepts that go into it. Take time to brainstorm a list of values that are important to you. What are some of the positive strong qualities that set you apart from the next person? Make a list of 10 of the most important things in your life. Think over and list 5 core principles that are unchangeable and are the basis for your worldview and lifestyle.

Just as the Constitution is the standard for our country the Personal Mission Statement is the standard to guide our sense of purpose through the storms of life. Our world is always changing but a mission statement can help remind us of the inner strengths and principles we believe in that do not change. It can help us keep moving towards our goals and pursuits in our life journey by providing a guideline to keep on track with what is important to us.

The Mission Statement also helps us be more responsible so more can be accomplished of what we really want for our lives. Stephen Covey quotes Victor Frankl in his section on Mission statements. “Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, but rather must recognize that it is he who is asked. In a word, each man is questioned by life; and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can only respond by being responsible.” We are responsible for our choices and following our personal beliefs. Understanding our responsibility to follow our mission statement encourages a deeper motivation and commitment to live our daily life by the principles and values important and keep a vision towards being goal centered which is important in living more than ok.

Keep your Mission Statement in a place you can review it often. Place it at your desk, as a wall poster hanging in your office or bedroom, or laminate a small version to place in your wallet or purse. This way you can review it on a regular basis and keep in fresh in your mind as a guiding force in your life. Does the Mission Statement ever change? As we go through shifts in our lives aspects of our life change but our core principles are usually constant unless a major philosophical and spiritual shift occurs. As we review our Mission Statements during periods of shifts there are new items that may need added and others replaced.

Here is a rough draft to my Personal Mission Statement:
 I seek to live a life pleasing to God as I follow the principles of Christ like living to the best of my ability.
 I seek to be a positive loving support to my wife and daughter in the journey God has for them.
 I am committed to grow in my creative and critical thinking skills in helping others grow to reach their God Given potential of living more than OK.
 I desire to live a more simple life to appreciate the savoring of God moments in life.
 I desire to live a thankful life for all that God brings into my life journey.



Reflection:
Get on Mission in your life. Take time to work on your Personal Mission Statement. Start by listing your core principles, values, things and people that are important to you. You can then write it out in a poem format, listing of declarative statements or in a narrative form. If you are really creative maybe do a poster using drawing along with your statements. Here are some examples of mission statements that may help in your constructing yours:
www.missionstatements.com

Making Time for Self Improvement

If we wish to live more than an ok life, one important area in our time management we need to include is time for self improvement. Through self improvement and self renewal we can spiral upwards to living more than ok. Too often in our lives the stuff of life snuffs out opportunities to take the time in our schedule to improve ourselves.

I like the metaphor in Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. In his seventh habit he calls it Sharpen the Saw. He looks at Sharpening the Saw as our taking time to improve ourselves in four areas of our lives: Physical, Social, Mental, and Spiritual. The Saw metaphor reminds us that we are a useful tool in our daily living with our work and interaction with others. Also as I have mentioned in the past we each have a purpose. Saws are purposeful when cutting wood, cutting limbs off trees, or cutting plastic/metal pipes to the correct length.

When our life is dull as a saw, it loses it’s effectiveness to fulfill it’s purpose. We become overcome with boredom and feel purposeless. The dullness also allows our lives to become out of balance and controlled by the stuff of life. We become stuck on autopilot with too many things happening to us instead of taking control and responsibility ourselves to make life happen for our advantage. The dull saw life is living just ok, getting by and enduring the sense of despair. A saw is not meant to be dull and rusty instead to fulfill its purpose, needs to be shiny and sharp. For maximum living we need to be shiny and sharp. That is what sharpening the saw is about.

Looking at the four areas Covey speaks of the first is the Physical. I have touched on this before. Are you taking time in your week for physical fitness? Three to four times a week you should be in some type of physical activity. I mentioned as a heart patient I exercise daily. I regularly use the treadmill and elliptical machines for aerobic exercise. I have also mentioned that my wife and I do a Leslie Sansone Walk at Home workout several times a week. Of course find out what works for you, gyms, neighborhood jogging, other dvd exercise programs of your choice. The key is to make it a part of your life rituals.

The second area is the Social. I haven’t discussed relationships yet in my blog postings but I will go more in depth in the future. As the saying goes, “No man is an island”. We all interact with others on a daily basis. That is why emotional intelligence is important. Managing and controlling our emotions to better improve our interactions with family, friends and strangers. Do you make time to improve your relationship connections with the significant people in your lives? Taking time to keep family strong and close relationships strong can keep your saw sharp and effective in your other interactions you face in life.

The third area is Mental. From my previous posting on critical thinking, you know the mental aspect of our lives is very important to me. We cannot be effective if our mind is dull. It hampers our thinking and causes us to make poor choices which then brings about negative consequences in our daily living. You can improve this area by becoming a Bookhead like me. Reading expand and strengthens our mind. Read more on topics you enjoy and expand your reading to new topics. You may also want to take a class at a local university or community college to sharpen your mind.

Then the fourth area is the Spiritual. One can improve in this realm of our being by following their religious heritage. As I have mentioned mine is the Christian heritage. For those without a religious heritage, who may consider themselves agnostic or atheist the spiritual can still have a place in taking time for Mindfulness Meditation, or taking time alone to reflect in nature. Those who follow a religious path need to place into their time schedule a daily time for spiritual development based on their particular teachings. I try each day to find time for devotion and prayer.

In closing, how is your saw doing? To live the best life possible we need to take control of our time and place in our schedules time for Sharpening the Saw. As we improve physically, socially, mentally, and spiritually we will have more energy and be more alert for the other major areas in our busy schedule. If we don’t it will be like sawing a tree with a dull rusty blade. We won’t get the job done and we may even break.

Reflection:
Rate yourself in the four areas: Physical, Social, Mental, and Spiritual. Which area are your strongest in? Which area do you need the most growth in?

What physical activities are you involved in?

How are you working to improve your most significant relationships?

How are you improving your Mental side of your life? Are you reading a new book? Have you considered taking a Continuing Education course at a local College or an online course?

Do you take time each day to improve your spiritual life?