Part of the continual journey of Living More than OK is tapping into your creativity. I have said it before and keep telling students that we are all creative to some degree. And that degree of creativity in us can grow and improve. Like all aspects of our living to keep life to the fullest we need to keep progressing and growing on our journey. That is so true in creativity. Know which areas of creativity relate to you, writing, poetry, music, drawing, photography or acting. For initial exploring of creativity expressions that fit you explore on the internet websites like www.creativity-portal.com , www.creativityworkshop.com, websitetips.com/creativity or other sites you find on a web search for creativity.
Exploring information like that may give you insight whether you wish to work on writing, music or drawing. Another important help in growing in your creativity is doing it. Make time in your schedule to practice the piano, take photos with your camera or set aside time to write. Is this easy to do? To be honest no. The weeds of activities choke out opportunity to practice the creative arts in our lives. The just getting by, ok life is full of these weeds making our time fill up with unimportant activities that keep us from growing into the more than ok life. The life of flourishing abundance we were meant to live. So we need to in our time schedules do our best to honor our potential possibilities for growth by setting aside time for creativity.
One very important way to grow in our creativity is the being a bookhead approach. My daughter still thinks of me as a bookhead. Take advantage of the great books on tapping into your creativity. I will look at a variety of authors who are expert writers and their books on writing and the arts are like having a personal mentor beside you. You can learn more about creativity and the various art forms by reading their books.
The author I wish to speak of today is Eric Maisel, Ph. D. He is a family therapist as his Ph D is in Counseling Psychology. Another aspect of his counseling practice is he is a famous Creativity Coach. He has written fiction and nonfiction books. His nonfiction books focus primarily on the arts and creativity. As an author he speaks to the heart of creativity in all of us. His books are very practical as well, with exercises and activities to do and think over. I have in my book library his Creativity for Life; A Writer’s Space, and Coaching the Artist Within. What I like is he speaks to all areas of the arts. Personally I am presently trying to grow in my writing side of my creativity. His books have been an encouragement to me as I try to haltingly progress.
All kinds of important topics are covered in his writings: writer’s block, the creative process, self awareness, growth, staying committed to your artwork. These are important areas for all artists to continue to grow in to improve their creative side and keep improving in their chosen art specialty. He also includes writing prompts and thought provoking reflections to help the reader grow in their lives. So if you are desiring to grow in the artistic and creative side of your life Check out some book by Dr. Eric Maisel. You can find out more about Dr. Maisel at his website -- www.ericmaisel.com
Reflection:
Take some time to explore the above mentioned websites on creativity. What new ideas about creativity did you learn? What area of art do you want to explore and improve in? Check out one of Dr. Maisel’s books at a local library and try out one of his creativity exercises. Write down what yo learned from the experience.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Go for Natural Highs
From my involvement as a Counselor in local drug/alcohol groups and as I think back to my high school days knowing students who used drugs, their quest seemed to aim at getting high. They were bored and they wanted to move beyond more than ok and the booze and drugs gave them that immediate high, euphoric feeling that took them away from the dullness of their existence.
Back in high school as a Christian, I could never figure out drug users and those who drank. Even my oldest brother who was an alcoholic, as I observed him drunk, I did not see what the enticement was. Once in senior high school chemistry I remember two students at my table were laughing about how they got smashed at a party saying how fun it was. One said he drank 12 beers. Out of curiosity how one person could drink that much I asked how could he drink 12 cans of beer? His buddy laughed saying he threw up 3 or 4 times. They were laughing but I did not say anything. I just thought “what fun?!”. I never enjoyed having the stomach flu and throwing up! It sounded like the party experience was that!
In reading books and research articles on boredom I do know that one reason why people do alcohol and drugs is they want that high. They want the feeling of something beyond boring okness. The problems are the crash after the high are headaches, grogginess, forgetting what they were doing while high, (which is often very foolish things). There is also the creation of an addiction to the alcohol or drugs creating anxiety, depression, paranoia, and criminal acts to feed the addiction. I remember always thinking to myself in high school as I considered the foolishness of drugs, that I would rather enjoy myself being in control of my full faculties and knowing what I enjoyed so I can do it again. Instead the chemical high places people in a mental stupor to do foolish and even deadly things to themselves and others all for the sake of fun?? I will take a natural high any day.
What is a natural high? From the website www.naturalhigh.orgthey say a natural high is “ is an activity, art form, or sport that you LOVE to do and makes you feel good inside; A Natural High does not involve drugs and alcohol”. So it is doing a hobby or activity that you really enjoy and brings pleasure to you, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s concept of Flow which I have spoken of before fits well with the going for natural highs. In his book Beyond Boredom and Anxiety he presents the elements of flow. He states that the person is aware of their actions but you are not thinking about how to do the actions. Awareness and action merge into a oneness. Flow happens when a person’s ability is of a level where they can move through the activity be it, playing an instrument, painting, sports activity, or any other favorite activity and not have to think through the steps. They can flow through the activity. There is a timelessness and being in the moment during the feeling of flow. So being in the state of flow is a natural high as a person is feeling a oneness with the activity and not consciously aware. His book reveals how Flow moves us beyond boredom and what I call more than ok..
So what are some ways you can go for a natural high in your life. One important thing to realize is we do not need to be high all the time. As Lars Svendsen, a philosopher in Norway, says in the Philosophy of Boredom -- boredom is. We all experience it. Life is not a Hollywood action movie. So much of our life is in the ok zone and can feel boring. Yet to have a full life and make the most of having joy in our journey and living more than ok overall, we need those high times. We need to realize though that natural highs are the way to go. If everyone is enjoying a life of natural highs there will be no need for the illegal drugs. Going for Natural highs will help lower crime rates and stop the senseless killings as we see presently in the drug wars in Mexico. For the addict they need to see what times and what feelings trigger the use of their substances in the desire to get high and replace them with activities, hobbies, and other alternatives to drugs and then go for the natural highs. For the non addict as wel, l to enjoy more of life they can find flow activities that can bring natural highs into their life experiences.
A good place to go for new ideas on natural highs are websites like the previous one mentioned or another website I discovered that focuses on natural highs – www.naturalhighs.ning.com
At those websites you can view testimonials on the personal enjoyment of natural highs. Also there are videos and blogs on the topics as well. With these websites and personal brainstorming on natural highs that fit your likes and desires, there is no need for anyone to go for the false, damaging highs of drugs and alcohol. And I strongly say damaging for the individual addict, their friends, and family not to mention the cost to employers and society. That goes for marijuana too, the darling drug of Hollywood and rockers. I remember working with a student once who told me, “Sir they say marijuana is not addictive but they lie. It is” He had started smoking it at age 12 and by the time he was in college he was hooked. He told me his addiction to marijuana had dulled his learning ability. It had also sapped him of passion for a career. Instead the addiction tempted him to just hang around, do nothing, and be high. The best way to combat the drug problem is to give young people and everyone alternatives to drug induced highs and that is by supporting and promoting natural highs.
Reflection:
Take some time to explore the websites below on natural highs. Tell others about them as well. Then take 15 minutes to brainstorm natural highs you wish to go for in your life.
Websites on natural highs.
www.naturalhighs.ning.com
www.naturalhigh.org
Back in high school as a Christian, I could never figure out drug users and those who drank. Even my oldest brother who was an alcoholic, as I observed him drunk, I did not see what the enticement was. Once in senior high school chemistry I remember two students at my table were laughing about how they got smashed at a party saying how fun it was. One said he drank 12 beers. Out of curiosity how one person could drink that much I asked how could he drink 12 cans of beer? His buddy laughed saying he threw up 3 or 4 times. They were laughing but I did not say anything. I just thought “what fun?!”. I never enjoyed having the stomach flu and throwing up! It sounded like the party experience was that!
In reading books and research articles on boredom I do know that one reason why people do alcohol and drugs is they want that high. They want the feeling of something beyond boring okness. The problems are the crash after the high are headaches, grogginess, forgetting what they were doing while high, (which is often very foolish things). There is also the creation of an addiction to the alcohol or drugs creating anxiety, depression, paranoia, and criminal acts to feed the addiction. I remember always thinking to myself in high school as I considered the foolishness of drugs, that I would rather enjoy myself being in control of my full faculties and knowing what I enjoyed so I can do it again. Instead the chemical high places people in a mental stupor to do foolish and even deadly things to themselves and others all for the sake of fun?? I will take a natural high any day.
What is a natural high? From the website www.naturalhigh.orgthey say a natural high is “ is an activity, art form, or sport that you LOVE to do and makes you feel good inside; A Natural High does not involve drugs and alcohol”. So it is doing a hobby or activity that you really enjoy and brings pleasure to you, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s concept of Flow which I have spoken of before fits well with the going for natural highs. In his book Beyond Boredom and Anxiety he presents the elements of flow. He states that the person is aware of their actions but you are not thinking about how to do the actions. Awareness and action merge into a oneness. Flow happens when a person’s ability is of a level where they can move through the activity be it, playing an instrument, painting, sports activity, or any other favorite activity and not have to think through the steps. They can flow through the activity. There is a timelessness and being in the moment during the feeling of flow. So being in the state of flow is a natural high as a person is feeling a oneness with the activity and not consciously aware. His book reveals how Flow moves us beyond boredom and what I call more than ok..
So what are some ways you can go for a natural high in your life. One important thing to realize is we do not need to be high all the time. As Lars Svendsen, a philosopher in Norway, says in the Philosophy of Boredom -- boredom is. We all experience it. Life is not a Hollywood action movie. So much of our life is in the ok zone and can feel boring. Yet to have a full life and make the most of having joy in our journey and living more than ok overall, we need those high times. We need to realize though that natural highs are the way to go. If everyone is enjoying a life of natural highs there will be no need for the illegal drugs. Going for Natural highs will help lower crime rates and stop the senseless killings as we see presently in the drug wars in Mexico. For the addict they need to see what times and what feelings trigger the use of their substances in the desire to get high and replace them with activities, hobbies, and other alternatives to drugs and then go for the natural highs. For the non addict as wel, l to enjoy more of life they can find flow activities that can bring natural highs into their life experiences.
A good place to go for new ideas on natural highs are websites like the previous one mentioned or another website I discovered that focuses on natural highs – www.naturalhighs.ning.com
At those websites you can view testimonials on the personal enjoyment of natural highs. Also there are videos and blogs on the topics as well. With these websites and personal brainstorming on natural highs that fit your likes and desires, there is no need for anyone to go for the false, damaging highs of drugs and alcohol. And I strongly say damaging for the individual addict, their friends, and family not to mention the cost to employers and society. That goes for marijuana too, the darling drug of Hollywood and rockers. I remember working with a student once who told me, “Sir they say marijuana is not addictive but they lie. It is” He had started smoking it at age 12 and by the time he was in college he was hooked. He told me his addiction to marijuana had dulled his learning ability. It had also sapped him of passion for a career. Instead the addiction tempted him to just hang around, do nothing, and be high. The best way to combat the drug problem is to give young people and everyone alternatives to drug induced highs and that is by supporting and promoting natural highs.
Reflection:
Take some time to explore the websites below on natural highs. Tell others about them as well. Then take 15 minutes to brainstorm natural highs you wish to go for in your life.
Websites on natural highs.
www.naturalhighs.ning.com
www.naturalhigh.org
Monday, May 10, 2010
Pursuit of Good Habits
Living in a border town with all the news of the drug trade continuously brought me recently to think of habits. The senseless killings and lives destroyed stem from the demand of drug usage in the U.S. As a volunteer at a local Drug Abuse Center I have attended many drug and alcohol abuse meetings. Listening to the stories I hear of lives ruined due to the drug habit. Drugs and alcohol are bad habits as the regular use of a substance ruins the life experience of the user. Smoking cigarettes is another bad habit. I had an older brother who died of lung cancer due to a life habit of smoking. It has been good to see in American society fewer people smoking. Those who do should observe someone dying of lung cancer so they can rethink that habit.
Dr. William Glasser points out these habits come about through people’s wrong choices in searching for happiness. Their choice of drugs for happiness does provide initial good feelings but but in the long term in the stories I have experienced their choice of drug and alcohol habits leads to misery. Dr. Glasser in his book Choice Theory: A New Psychology of Personal Freedom states, “ If we can not create a society in which more people are happy, we will never come close to reducing these destructive and self-destructive choices,” (referring to drugs and alcohol).
Knowing the personal ruin caused by drugs and seeing in the news the thousands killed in the drug wars in Mexico upsets me when I see how Hollywood and some rock, pop, and hip-hop musicians glamorize drugs to youth. The lack of critical thinking in those who want something that destroys people legalized is sickening. In my eyes those who glamorize drugs and want them legal have the blood of the thousands of Mexicans and the thousands of ruined lives here in the U.S. on their hands. If only the media would place this truth in the face of those promoting drugs so people would stop using drugs. Then there would be no demand for drugs therefore no drug war. The drug cartels would effectively be out of business.
In the meantime what can be done to better create a society Dr. Glasser is speaking of in the previous quote? Positive psychology is about presenting life principles to help build up happiness in people without having to turn to drugs. I see in positive psychology the emphasis on building up positive natural highs instead of chemical highs. Also as I have mentioned from my Christian viewpoint, I believe living a life that focuses on the spiritual helps in promoting natural highs as well, As we create habits that are spiritual in nature instead of popping pills and snorting chemicals into the body we can live happier and more fulfilled lives.
It all goes back to the habits we have in our lives. I had a sociology professor in Chicago who started out each lecture reminding us that humans are creatures of habit. Practically all we do in life relates to our habits. We take the same roads to work. We park in the same parking spot and become upset if someone is parked in, “our spot”. I enjoy mentioning to students in my university success course there is no seating chart like in high school but if they notice they usually sit in the same seat each class session – habit. I had a Professor in graduate school one night after three weeks into the semester tell everyone to get up and change seats. Everyone was initially frozen as no one wanted to give up “their seat” – habit. So if we are honest habits control much of our living.
To have a more than ok life, to maximize our living, to build natural highs into our living, we need to evaluate our habits and make choices to create good habits in our life. Jack Canfield in his practical book on life success, The Success Principles, has this to say about habits. “Negative habits breed negative consequences. Positive habits create positive consequences.” I have never met anyone who admits to wanting negativity in their lives. Yet look at all the personal problems and relationship problems in life. Through personal choices many are creating negative habits with ruinous results in their lives and lives of those around them. So a bad habit is an activity ritually being done that is causing negative effects in your life. To get rid of the bad habits we need to choose to replace them with something else. That is one reason habits are hard to break. People just stop the habit. Since there is nothing to fill the void the person rushes back to the bad habit often defeated and building negative self talk of. “Well I tried and failed so I guess I just can’t stop”. So before stopping have a positive habit ready to take its place.
IF you look into new habit creating on the internet most statements point to the need to do something 21 days in a row to create a new habit. I remember in a Positive Psychology class I took the professor emphasized make a commitment for 30 days to get the new ritual habit firm in your life. So if you feel your are negatively affected by spending several hours a night in a habit of watching tv you may want to create a couple new habits of exercise and painting to fill up the time. Think of things you would enjoy doing that will have positive consequences in your life.
Reflection
Are there any negative habits dragging your life down to just ok existing? Write down two new habits you would like to begin in your life to better improve you daily experience.
Dr. William Glasser points out these habits come about through people’s wrong choices in searching for happiness. Their choice of drugs for happiness does provide initial good feelings but but in the long term in the stories I have experienced their choice of drug and alcohol habits leads to misery. Dr. Glasser in his book Choice Theory: A New Psychology of Personal Freedom states, “ If we can not create a society in which more people are happy, we will never come close to reducing these destructive and self-destructive choices,” (referring to drugs and alcohol).
Knowing the personal ruin caused by drugs and seeing in the news the thousands killed in the drug wars in Mexico upsets me when I see how Hollywood and some rock, pop, and hip-hop musicians glamorize drugs to youth. The lack of critical thinking in those who want something that destroys people legalized is sickening. In my eyes those who glamorize drugs and want them legal have the blood of the thousands of Mexicans and the thousands of ruined lives here in the U.S. on their hands. If only the media would place this truth in the face of those promoting drugs so people would stop using drugs. Then there would be no demand for drugs therefore no drug war. The drug cartels would effectively be out of business.
In the meantime what can be done to better create a society Dr. Glasser is speaking of in the previous quote? Positive psychology is about presenting life principles to help build up happiness in people without having to turn to drugs. I see in positive psychology the emphasis on building up positive natural highs instead of chemical highs. Also as I have mentioned from my Christian viewpoint, I believe living a life that focuses on the spiritual helps in promoting natural highs as well, As we create habits that are spiritual in nature instead of popping pills and snorting chemicals into the body we can live happier and more fulfilled lives.
It all goes back to the habits we have in our lives. I had a sociology professor in Chicago who started out each lecture reminding us that humans are creatures of habit. Practically all we do in life relates to our habits. We take the same roads to work. We park in the same parking spot and become upset if someone is parked in, “our spot”. I enjoy mentioning to students in my university success course there is no seating chart like in high school but if they notice they usually sit in the same seat each class session – habit. I had a Professor in graduate school one night after three weeks into the semester tell everyone to get up and change seats. Everyone was initially frozen as no one wanted to give up “their seat” – habit. So if we are honest habits control much of our living.
To have a more than ok life, to maximize our living, to build natural highs into our living, we need to evaluate our habits and make choices to create good habits in our life. Jack Canfield in his practical book on life success, The Success Principles, has this to say about habits. “Negative habits breed negative consequences. Positive habits create positive consequences.” I have never met anyone who admits to wanting negativity in their lives. Yet look at all the personal problems and relationship problems in life. Through personal choices many are creating negative habits with ruinous results in their lives and lives of those around them. So a bad habit is an activity ritually being done that is causing negative effects in your life. To get rid of the bad habits we need to choose to replace them with something else. That is one reason habits are hard to break. People just stop the habit. Since there is nothing to fill the void the person rushes back to the bad habit often defeated and building negative self talk of. “Well I tried and failed so I guess I just can’t stop”. So before stopping have a positive habit ready to take its place.
IF you look into new habit creating on the internet most statements point to the need to do something 21 days in a row to create a new habit. I remember in a Positive Psychology class I took the professor emphasized make a commitment for 30 days to get the new ritual habit firm in your life. So if you feel your are negatively affected by spending several hours a night in a habit of watching tv you may want to create a couple new habits of exercise and painting to fill up the time. Think of things you would enjoy doing that will have positive consequences in your life.
Reflection
Are there any negative habits dragging your life down to just ok existing? Write down two new habits you would like to begin in your life to better improve you daily experience.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
What If You Ruled The World?
Recently a friend knowing some of my blog postings look at songs and their meanings for our life experience sent me the song, If I Ruled the World, by Leslie Bricusse and Cyril Ornadel that was sung by Tony Bennett back in the 1960’s. The song makes me think of the personal power we have in our choices to improve our lives and the lives of those around us. Shad Helmstetter in his book Choices states, “ Who knows what you could accomplish in life if you made more of the right choices along the way.” Each day by the choices we make, we rule our world. The question is what kind of world are we creating? Click on the title of the Tony Bennett song and hear him sing it and then take some moments to reflect over the words.
IF I RULED THE WORLD
Tony Bennett
Words by Leslie Bricusse/Music by Cyril Ornadel
If I ruled the world, ev'ry day would be the first day of spring
Every heart would have a new song to sing
And we'd sing of the joy every morning would bring
If I ruled the world, ev'ry man would be as free as a bird,
Ev'ry voice would be a voice to be heard
Take my word we would treasure each day that occurred
My world would be a beautiful place
Where we would weave such wonderful dreams
My world would wear a smile on its face
Like the man in the moon has when the moon beams
If I ruled the world every man would say the world was his friend
There'd be happiness that no man could end
No my friend, not if I ruled the world
Every head would be held up high
There'd be sunshine in everyone's sky
If the day ever dawned when I ruled the world
Why this song makes me think of the power of our choices, is pondering over what I would do if I ruled the world for a day? As we step out each day don’t we by our choices make rulings on how our individual worlds will be created and run? There are many positive desires and choices, Leslie Bricusse presents in his lyrics that are a guide to the kind of choices we can make in living more than ok.
In the very beginning he pronounces “ev'ry day would be the first day of spring”. Spring is a season of new creation and creativity as flowers and plants bloom. What if we carried that attitude and choice into each day? Looking at each day as a refreshing adventure instead of a dreary struggle to fight through. No wonder stress and depression is so high when the daily attitude is anticipating the grey storm clouds in the daily journey instead of looking forward to the blooming roses in the day’s activities. The phrase, “we'd sing of the joy every morning would bring” reminded me of memories riding the Chicago subway trains in the morning to work. There was never much joy on the faces of people on their way to work. How would the workday change if there was more joy in the attitude choices we make in our day? The song also speaks of smiles as bright as moon beams and happiness. Smiles and a cheery attitude can be a part of how we rule our day for the better in helping to spread joy to the stressed out worker at the cash register, the bus driver, or someone fighting the Monday Morning Blues. Have you ever noticed an attitude in a crabby store worker when you smile and say have a nice day. They immediately for the most part brighten up.
Another standout phrase is “we would treasure each day that occurred”. We should rule our world with the attitude of gratitude that I have mentioned in the past. Treasuring is to savor all the good memories that come to us each and every day. We gain more out of life if we reflect over the good that comes out of each day rather than expanding on the few negatives. Treasuring each day is a positive choice we can make to impact our positive growth. Then the last phrase that stands out to me is “if I ruled the world every head would be held up high”. The thought of the importance of personal self esteem and respecting each other’s self esteem comes to my mind in this phrase of the lyrics. I will delve more into self esteem in the future. In recent years self esteem has been given a bad rap . We need as we go through each day holding our head up high so we can see the roses in our life, the moon beams in the sky, and the beauty of the sunsets that we can apply to all the good things in life. If we insecurely mop around with our head to the ground we will miss so much of what life has to offer,
Reflection:
What would the world be like if you were ruler for a day? What positive choices can you learn from the song, IF I RULED THE WORLD, to brighten your daily journey?
IF I RULED THE WORLD
Tony Bennett
Words by Leslie Bricusse/Music by Cyril Ornadel
If I ruled the world, ev'ry day would be the first day of spring
Every heart would have a new song to sing
And we'd sing of the joy every morning would bring
If I ruled the world, ev'ry man would be as free as a bird,
Ev'ry voice would be a voice to be heard
Take my word we would treasure each day that occurred
My world would be a beautiful place
Where we would weave such wonderful dreams
My world would wear a smile on its face
Like the man in the moon has when the moon beams
If I ruled the world every man would say the world was his friend
There'd be happiness that no man could end
No my friend, not if I ruled the world
Every head would be held up high
There'd be sunshine in everyone's sky
If the day ever dawned when I ruled the world
Why this song makes me think of the power of our choices, is pondering over what I would do if I ruled the world for a day? As we step out each day don’t we by our choices make rulings on how our individual worlds will be created and run? There are many positive desires and choices, Leslie Bricusse presents in his lyrics that are a guide to the kind of choices we can make in living more than ok.
In the very beginning he pronounces “ev'ry day would be the first day of spring”. Spring is a season of new creation and creativity as flowers and plants bloom. What if we carried that attitude and choice into each day? Looking at each day as a refreshing adventure instead of a dreary struggle to fight through. No wonder stress and depression is so high when the daily attitude is anticipating the grey storm clouds in the daily journey instead of looking forward to the blooming roses in the day’s activities. The phrase, “we'd sing of the joy every morning would bring” reminded me of memories riding the Chicago subway trains in the morning to work. There was never much joy on the faces of people on their way to work. How would the workday change if there was more joy in the attitude choices we make in our day? The song also speaks of smiles as bright as moon beams and happiness. Smiles and a cheery attitude can be a part of how we rule our day for the better in helping to spread joy to the stressed out worker at the cash register, the bus driver, or someone fighting the Monday Morning Blues. Have you ever noticed an attitude in a crabby store worker when you smile and say have a nice day. They immediately for the most part brighten up.
Another standout phrase is “we would treasure each day that occurred”. We should rule our world with the attitude of gratitude that I have mentioned in the past. Treasuring is to savor all the good memories that come to us each and every day. We gain more out of life if we reflect over the good that comes out of each day rather than expanding on the few negatives. Treasuring each day is a positive choice we can make to impact our positive growth. Then the last phrase that stands out to me is “if I ruled the world every head would be held up high”. The thought of the importance of personal self esteem and respecting each other’s self esteem comes to my mind in this phrase of the lyrics. I will delve more into self esteem in the future. In recent years self esteem has been given a bad rap . We need as we go through each day holding our head up high so we can see the roses in our life, the moon beams in the sky, and the beauty of the sunsets that we can apply to all the good things in life. If we insecurely mop around with our head to the ground we will miss so much of what life has to offer,
Reflection:
What would the world be like if you were ruler for a day? What positive choices can you learn from the song, IF I RULED THE WORLD, to brighten your daily journey?
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Understanding Your Life Themes Using a Wandering Map
In the past I have discussed Chaos theory as it relates to life and careers. I recently read an insightful book on the topic by Dr. Katherine Brooks of UT Austin entitled, You Majored In What? Mapping Your Path from Chaos to Career. As we go through day to day life it can look very chaotic with a mix of happenstance events invading our life. Dr. Brooks points out as you look at the longer journey, the bigger picture of your life, connections and themes can be observed. Patterns are created by the chaotic seemingly random details.
The idea reminds me of reading Edith Schaeffer’s book, The Tapestry, years ago. It is the life of Francis and Edith Schaeffer looking back at their family line and their life together. The book is a delightful read if you can find it in a library or used bookstore. It reminds us as we go through the short periods of life, life looks like the underside of a tapestry – a chaotic mess of tied together fabric. Yet if you turn it over you can see the beautiful pattern.
Dr. Brooks in her book presents a creative exercise that helps us look at our details of life and glean from the pieces important themes and connections that reveal strengths that we can use to guide our lives and career pathways. She calls it the Wandering Map. It is a tool to help us creatively explore our talents and strengths so as to open up new possibilities; helps in savoring past events and gaining personal insight of past events; helps us view themes and patterns in our life journey. This activity will improve your self discovery which is part of Living More Than OK.
I will walk through the elements of the Wandering Map so you can try it out. I encourage you to pick up a copy of the book as it touches on so many other areas of our career life. Or if you know of a college student undergoing angst over their education and career journey recommend this book to them. You can find out more information about the book at her website www.YouMajoredInWhat.com
First of all get a blank 8 ½ x11 piece of paper or a larger poster board; and some colored markers or crayons to help you be creative with this. Set aside some quiet time to enjoy this brainstorming activity. You can use a table or desk or if your knees don’t give you trouble, you can sprawl out on the floor.
Next, think back over your life from childhood to the present for activities, places traveled, favorite classes, significant people, meaningful books ( a bookhead like me has to include books in the list), jobs, hobbies and ect. Write these items down on the paper in a random manner as they come to you. It will seem chaotic but again this stems from our thoughts on chaos theory, so just let the ideas flow. The paper or poster will soon have an appearance of a Mindmap.
As you look at all the items from your life experience you listed, start jotting down thoughts of a few key words that relate to them. Also make sure you write down key turning points in your life experience.
Now put the markers down and silently reflect or if you are musical have some favorite music on and mindfully reflect over the big picture of all that is on the paper. Begin looking for connections that may flow through your childhood activities up to the present. Then draw different colored lines that will connect the differing items on your list that have a connection.
After you have made the connections, list categories that come to mind. Try to make an initial list of 5. For example 5 that come up for my wandering map are – Spirituality, reading books ( what a surprise!), Counseling, music, studying psychology.
Then finally ponder over the categories and see if you can come up with overarching themes for the Wandering Map. You may want to write these down at the top of the map. Here is a sampling of some of the themes Dr. Brooks lists in her book on page 34. Purchase her book for the complete list or brainstorm over theme ideas:
Adventure – taking risks, trying new things
Creativity – self-expression, ideas as in art and music
Family – nurturing, children, family gatherings
Health – exercise and eating well
Independence -- freedom and autonomy
Leadership – organizing, inspiring
Learning – acquiring knowledge, life-long learning
Physical Work – using your hands, building
Security – safety, stability
Spirituality – practicing religion meditating
Wealth – acquiring money, economic security
Jot down a list of your key themes and as I mentioned the themes may make a nice title for your paper or poster if you used poster board. You can do this activity by yourself or you may want to do it as a family or with a group of friends. The important thing is have fun with it and see what new insights you can learn about yourself through the experience.
Reflection:
Take some time to journal about your Wandering Map. What were your primary themes and how are they important to you? What are some feelings you experienced as you wrote your initial list?
The idea reminds me of reading Edith Schaeffer’s book, The Tapestry, years ago. It is the life of Francis and Edith Schaeffer looking back at their family line and their life together. The book is a delightful read if you can find it in a library or used bookstore. It reminds us as we go through the short periods of life, life looks like the underside of a tapestry – a chaotic mess of tied together fabric. Yet if you turn it over you can see the beautiful pattern.
Dr. Brooks in her book presents a creative exercise that helps us look at our details of life and glean from the pieces important themes and connections that reveal strengths that we can use to guide our lives and career pathways. She calls it the Wandering Map. It is a tool to help us creatively explore our talents and strengths so as to open up new possibilities; helps in savoring past events and gaining personal insight of past events; helps us view themes and patterns in our life journey. This activity will improve your self discovery which is part of Living More Than OK.
I will walk through the elements of the Wandering Map so you can try it out. I encourage you to pick up a copy of the book as it touches on so many other areas of our career life. Or if you know of a college student undergoing angst over their education and career journey recommend this book to them. You can find out more information about the book at her website www.YouMajoredInWhat.com
First of all get a blank 8 ½ x11 piece of paper or a larger poster board; and some colored markers or crayons to help you be creative with this. Set aside some quiet time to enjoy this brainstorming activity. You can use a table or desk or if your knees don’t give you trouble, you can sprawl out on the floor.
Next, think back over your life from childhood to the present for activities, places traveled, favorite classes, significant people, meaningful books ( a bookhead like me has to include books in the list), jobs, hobbies and ect. Write these items down on the paper in a random manner as they come to you. It will seem chaotic but again this stems from our thoughts on chaos theory, so just let the ideas flow. The paper or poster will soon have an appearance of a Mindmap.
As you look at all the items from your life experience you listed, start jotting down thoughts of a few key words that relate to them. Also make sure you write down key turning points in your life experience.
Now put the markers down and silently reflect or if you are musical have some favorite music on and mindfully reflect over the big picture of all that is on the paper. Begin looking for connections that may flow through your childhood activities up to the present. Then draw different colored lines that will connect the differing items on your list that have a connection.
After you have made the connections, list categories that come to mind. Try to make an initial list of 5. For example 5 that come up for my wandering map are – Spirituality, reading books ( what a surprise!), Counseling, music, studying psychology.
Then finally ponder over the categories and see if you can come up with overarching themes for the Wandering Map. You may want to write these down at the top of the map. Here is a sampling of some of the themes Dr. Brooks lists in her book on page 34. Purchase her book for the complete list or brainstorm over theme ideas:
Adventure – taking risks, trying new things
Creativity – self-expression, ideas as in art and music
Family – nurturing, children, family gatherings
Health – exercise and eating well
Independence -- freedom and autonomy
Leadership – organizing, inspiring
Learning – acquiring knowledge, life-long learning
Physical Work – using your hands, building
Security – safety, stability
Spirituality – practicing religion meditating
Wealth – acquiring money, economic security
Jot down a list of your key themes and as I mentioned the themes may make a nice title for your paper or poster if you used poster board. You can do this activity by yourself or you may want to do it as a family or with a group of friends. The important thing is have fun with it and see what new insights you can learn about yourself through the experience.
Reflection:
Take some time to journal about your Wandering Map. What were your primary themes and how are they important to you? What are some feelings you experienced as you wrote your initial list?
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Growing in Our Critical Thinking Skills
I recently had a question related to Critical Thinking so I thought I would speak again to this important issue as I believe our thought life is important to Living More Than OK. Here is the question:
One of my friends told me she has issues with not having critical thinking. She was wondering whether it has anything to do with her personality or training deficit. Any thoughts ?
It is not a matter of not having critical thinking it is more a matter of developing our critical thinking skills. We are thinking all the time. Even when we are moving on autopilot the brain is processing the observations around us. The questioner mentions personality. There are personality theories that bring up the point that some people are more predisposed to be to be thinkers while others may be more of doers for example. When we look at those around us we do notice differences in people’s thinking. Some people jump right into different activities or relationships while others think through deeply before they make a move. This just shows we are different and unique. Our thinking skills fall on a continuum and on that continuum we can always rise to a higher level. The important point is that we can all improve our critical thinking skills which will help in every aspect of life, personal relationships, money matters, health, work, future plans, and ect.
Remember that critical thinking is not a negative activity of putting things down or having a negative cranky spirit. Vincent Ruggiero in his book Making Your Mind Matter shows that critical thinking is a positive activity of evaluating ideas from others and yourself in order to improve the ideas and choose the best one. This relates well as I previously mentioned Richard Paul and Linda Elder in their writings bring out that questioning is key to critical thinking. Ruggiero in his book, mentions a thinking style which I feel captures important features of critical thinking as it relates to daily challenges we all face. He calls it the WISE approach. This is one way in which to improve critical thinking in our life.
Wonder - Go through each day with a sense of wonder making note and observations of your experience and thoughts during the day. You may want to record key events problems, and thoughts relevant in a journal.
Investigate – With key problems or important issues do thoughtful research for solutions.
Speculate – Use the power of questions in relation to problems and life issues. Brainstorm creative solutions.
Evaluate - Try out the solutions to challenges you face during the day and look for the most effective ways to improve your life.
Another way to improve our thinking is Richard Paul and Linda Elder’s admonition that we should become a critic of our own thinking. Again this is not a negative hitting ourselves on the head , “Oh, I’m so stupid. I just can’t think!” No it is taking the time to “think about your thinking in order to make it better”, (Richard Paul). Take a seat back and ponder over your thinking, how do you think through issues facing you? What have been the circumstances that resulted from your thinking? How can you improve your thinking quality.
The being a critic of our thinking approach reminded me of a verse in the Apostle Paul’s writing 2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV) “... and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” He is looking at our thought life from the spiritual standpoint of actively taking charge and control of our thoughts instead of drifting through our mental life on autopilot. The principle relates to all aspects of thought to be in control of our thinking and actively have our thoughts captive so we know why we believe what we believe and understand the thought process behind our actions.
Another important way to improve our thinking is as I mentioned in one of my early blog postings is to be a Bookhead. Read up on how to improve your thinking. We need to be life long learners. Here are a few book recommendations:
Critical Thinking – Tools for Taking Charge of Your Professional and Personal Life by Richard Paul & Linda Elder.
Thinking For a Change by John Maxwell. (Love that title!)
Making Your Mind Matter by Vincent Ruggiero
25 Days to Better Thinking & Better Living by Dr. Linda Elder & Dr. Richard Paul (This is a short book where you can devote a day at a time for 25 days on different aspects of improving your thinking.)
Also make use of Internet resources:
www.criticalthinking.org This website has numerous resource articles to expand your thinking on Critical Thinking.
http://www.rebtnetwork.org/whatis.html This is a website about Albert Ellis’ Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT). His theory helps us see the need for critical thinking as many of our problems are based in our faulty beliefs. There are very helpful ideas on this website to help improve our thinking process.
Reflection:
Take some quiet time alone to think about your thinking. On a scale of 1-10 what is the quality of your thinking? (1 being very weak -- 10 being saintly perfect). I always tell my students never give yourself a 10 rating on a rating scale as in this life we always have room to improve even if we think we are a 9.99!
Brainstorm ways in which you feel you can improve in your critical thinking skills.
One of my friends told me she has issues with not having critical thinking. She was wondering whether it has anything to do with her personality or training deficit. Any thoughts ?
It is not a matter of not having critical thinking it is more a matter of developing our critical thinking skills. We are thinking all the time. Even when we are moving on autopilot the brain is processing the observations around us. The questioner mentions personality. There are personality theories that bring up the point that some people are more predisposed to be to be thinkers while others may be more of doers for example. When we look at those around us we do notice differences in people’s thinking. Some people jump right into different activities or relationships while others think through deeply before they make a move. This just shows we are different and unique. Our thinking skills fall on a continuum and on that continuum we can always rise to a higher level. The important point is that we can all improve our critical thinking skills which will help in every aspect of life, personal relationships, money matters, health, work, future plans, and ect.
Remember that critical thinking is not a negative activity of putting things down or having a negative cranky spirit. Vincent Ruggiero in his book Making Your Mind Matter shows that critical thinking is a positive activity of evaluating ideas from others and yourself in order to improve the ideas and choose the best one. This relates well as I previously mentioned Richard Paul and Linda Elder in their writings bring out that questioning is key to critical thinking. Ruggiero in his book, mentions a thinking style which I feel captures important features of critical thinking as it relates to daily challenges we all face. He calls it the WISE approach. This is one way in which to improve critical thinking in our life.
Wonder - Go through each day with a sense of wonder making note and observations of your experience and thoughts during the day. You may want to record key events problems, and thoughts relevant in a journal.
Investigate – With key problems or important issues do thoughtful research for solutions.
Speculate – Use the power of questions in relation to problems and life issues. Brainstorm creative solutions.
Evaluate - Try out the solutions to challenges you face during the day and look for the most effective ways to improve your life.
Another way to improve our thinking is Richard Paul and Linda Elder’s admonition that we should become a critic of our own thinking. Again this is not a negative hitting ourselves on the head , “Oh, I’m so stupid. I just can’t think!” No it is taking the time to “think about your thinking in order to make it better”, (Richard Paul). Take a seat back and ponder over your thinking, how do you think through issues facing you? What have been the circumstances that resulted from your thinking? How can you improve your thinking quality.
The being a critic of our thinking approach reminded me of a verse in the Apostle Paul’s writing 2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV) “... and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” He is looking at our thought life from the spiritual standpoint of actively taking charge and control of our thoughts instead of drifting through our mental life on autopilot. The principle relates to all aspects of thought to be in control of our thinking and actively have our thoughts captive so we know why we believe what we believe and understand the thought process behind our actions.
Another important way to improve our thinking is as I mentioned in one of my early blog postings is to be a Bookhead. Read up on how to improve your thinking. We need to be life long learners. Here are a few book recommendations:
Critical Thinking – Tools for Taking Charge of Your Professional and Personal Life by Richard Paul & Linda Elder.
Thinking For a Change by John Maxwell. (Love that title!)
Making Your Mind Matter by Vincent Ruggiero
25 Days to Better Thinking & Better Living by Dr. Linda Elder & Dr. Richard Paul (This is a short book where you can devote a day at a time for 25 days on different aspects of improving your thinking.)
Also make use of Internet resources:
www.criticalthinking.org This website has numerous resource articles to expand your thinking on Critical Thinking.
http://www.rebtnetwork.org/whatis.html This is a website about Albert Ellis’ Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT). His theory helps us see the need for critical thinking as many of our problems are based in our faulty beliefs. There are very helpful ideas on this website to help improve our thinking process.
Reflection:
Take some quiet time alone to think about your thinking. On a scale of 1-10 what is the quality of your thinking? (1 being very weak -- 10 being saintly perfect). I always tell my students never give yourself a 10 rating on a rating scale as in this life we always have room to improve even if we think we are a 9.99!
Brainstorm ways in which you feel you can improve in your critical thinking skills.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
The Importance of Choices in Our Lives
Recently I received an email comment on my posting Our Humanity Messiness and Choices. You can read the comment at that posting. The person rightly pointed out that some messes occur due to our being locked up by our holding onto false beliefs generated through culture, society, religion, family, and ect. The commentator then used the example that men often do not go for help with problems due to the false beliefs that they should be strong and figure it out by themselves. A false pride in self; which is only fear of breaking free from the belief controlling them. The email ended with victory in the power to choose to free oneself of the fears of false belief. So I wanted to look more at our power to choose.
We can face fewer false beliefs if we challenge them with critical thinking skills I mentioned in the post Living More Than OK By Using Critical Thinking Skills. I will discuss more on that topic as well in the future. Yet even using critical thinking is a choice we must make. I mentioned power along with choice. “The greatest power that a person possesses is the power to choose” J. Martin Kohe, (author and psychologist). We have amazing power for good possibilities and bad in our lives based on the choices we make. Hal Urban in his book Life’s Greatest Lessons says, “…we all have the potential to do more with our lives. Every human being is capable of making great strides in self development and major increases in achievements.” As I have mentioned before that is a driving force in my starting this blog --the desire to help people maximize their potential and possibilities in life.
Too many people fail to reach their potential because they feel they do not have control. They fail to see that each day is full of choices that affect our present and futures. Sure there are the flat tires that come in our lives. No one wakes up choosing to be stranded on the side of the road with a flat. Even then we make a choice to get out of the car to fix the flat or call Triple A to fix the flat for us. I am a firm believer in Chaos Theory. Happenstance happens. Yet when the stuff of life we cannot control come crushing in we still have a choice what to do in response. Even the response of allowing ourselves to be crushed by the circumstance is a choice. Been there, been crushed and don’t recommend remaining crushed for a length of time.
To maximize our living we need to see the positive choices we can make each day. Even to make lemonade out of the lemons that drop into our lives. One of my favorite Psychological theories, ( probably because I believe in the power of Choice), is Choice Theory by Dr. William Glasser. A central aspect of Choice Theory is the belief that we are internally, not externally motivated. While other theories suggest that outside events "cause" us to behave in certain predictable ways, Choice Theory teaches that outside events never "make" us to do anything. What drives our behavior are internally developed notions of what is most important and satisfying to us. … Another major concept in Choice Theory is the notion that we always have some choice about how to behave. This does not mean that we have unlimited choice or that outside information is irrelevant as we choose how to behave. It means that we have more control than some people might believe and that we are responsible for the choices we make. (from www.choicetheory.com). What is going on internally in us is more important than the externals that affect our life journey. We are responsible to make the best choices for our good and for those traveling on the journey with us.
I like Dr. Glasser’s thinking, as the quote states we do not ignore the external information. If I have a flat tire I don’t ignore it and keep driving. “ My the road sure seems to be bumpy!” Of course it is not the road it is the flat tire. If I ignore the external, the small problem of the flat tire turns into the big problem of a smashed rim and broken axle. That bigger problem was the result of my ignoring the small problem. So by understanding the power of our choices we can maximize our living and sidetrack many of our problems which are results of poor choices or choosing not to choose.
As you wake up each day understand that you, not others are in control of your choices. Make the choice to make choices that will be the best for your life journey and for those travelling with you. “It is the big choices we make that set our direction. It is the smallest choices we make that get us to the destination.” –Shad Helmstetter-
Reflection:
Do you take the time to use critical thinking in the choices you make?
How do you respond to the external flat tires in your life?
Are there some choices you need to make that may bring new possibilities to your life journey?
We can face fewer false beliefs if we challenge them with critical thinking skills I mentioned in the post Living More Than OK By Using Critical Thinking Skills. I will discuss more on that topic as well in the future. Yet even using critical thinking is a choice we must make. I mentioned power along with choice. “The greatest power that a person possesses is the power to choose” J. Martin Kohe, (author and psychologist). We have amazing power for good possibilities and bad in our lives based on the choices we make. Hal Urban in his book Life’s Greatest Lessons says, “…we all have the potential to do more with our lives. Every human being is capable of making great strides in self development and major increases in achievements.” As I have mentioned before that is a driving force in my starting this blog --the desire to help people maximize their potential and possibilities in life.
Too many people fail to reach their potential because they feel they do not have control. They fail to see that each day is full of choices that affect our present and futures. Sure there are the flat tires that come in our lives. No one wakes up choosing to be stranded on the side of the road with a flat. Even then we make a choice to get out of the car to fix the flat or call Triple A to fix the flat for us. I am a firm believer in Chaos Theory. Happenstance happens. Yet when the stuff of life we cannot control come crushing in we still have a choice what to do in response. Even the response of allowing ourselves to be crushed by the circumstance is a choice. Been there, been crushed and don’t recommend remaining crushed for a length of time.
To maximize our living we need to see the positive choices we can make each day. Even to make lemonade out of the lemons that drop into our lives. One of my favorite Psychological theories, ( probably because I believe in the power of Choice), is Choice Theory by Dr. William Glasser. A central aspect of Choice Theory is the belief that we are internally, not externally motivated. While other theories suggest that outside events "cause" us to behave in certain predictable ways, Choice Theory teaches that outside events never "make" us to do anything. What drives our behavior are internally developed notions of what is most important and satisfying to us. … Another major concept in Choice Theory is the notion that we always have some choice about how to behave. This does not mean that we have unlimited choice or that outside information is irrelevant as we choose how to behave. It means that we have more control than some people might believe and that we are responsible for the choices we make. (from www.choicetheory.com). What is going on internally in us is more important than the externals that affect our life journey. We are responsible to make the best choices for our good and for those traveling on the journey with us.
I like Dr. Glasser’s thinking, as the quote states we do not ignore the external information. If I have a flat tire I don’t ignore it and keep driving. “ My the road sure seems to be bumpy!” Of course it is not the road it is the flat tire. If I ignore the external, the small problem of the flat tire turns into the big problem of a smashed rim and broken axle. That bigger problem was the result of my ignoring the small problem. So by understanding the power of our choices we can maximize our living and sidetrack many of our problems which are results of poor choices or choosing not to choose.
As you wake up each day understand that you, not others are in control of your choices. Make the choice to make choices that will be the best for your life journey and for those travelling with you. “It is the big choices we make that set our direction. It is the smallest choices we make that get us to the destination.” –Shad Helmstetter-
Reflection:
Do you take the time to use critical thinking in the choices you make?
How do you respond to the external flat tires in your life?
Are there some choices you need to make that may bring new possibilities to your life journey?
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