Resilience Building Through Our Comebacks

My last post spoke of the favorite sessions at the IPPA conference in Montreal. I mentioned my favorite session of the ones I attended was listening to Drs. Steger of Colorado State University & Russo-Netzer of University of Haifa, Israel, speak to the issue of purpose and meaning in their session, “More Than Skin Deep”. Another point they brought up was the difficulties we face in life we can grow through them with resilience. They mentioned at that point Victor Frankl known for his Logotherapy which came out of his enduring the suffering of German concentration camps during WWII. During their session at that point, I remember thinking about a Danny Gokey song “The Comeback”.

His song that he co-wrote speaks to the spirit of resilience that helps us to bounce back from difficulties and trials that face us in life. We all have different trials that face us but we all have been created with the ability to “Comeback” from the problems if we tap into resilience. As you watch the video by clicking on the title of the song you will see the video that looks at the example of a gymnast which is a sport like many others where resilience is seen if they want to improve and not give up. Take a moment to listen to Danny Gokey’s amazing voice and think over the message of the song:

The Comeback Danny Gokey (Click on Song Title to watch video)

After a season of night falls and push backs
After the heartache of wrong turns and sidetracks
Just when they think they've got you game set match
Here comes the comeback
Just cause you lay low got up slow unsteady
Don't mean you blacked out or bought out you're ready
Just when they think there's nothing left running on empty
Here comes the comeback
This is your time your moment
The fire the fight your golden
You've come so far keep going
Oh here comes the comeback
You feel the lightning the thunder you're soul shakes
Under the roar of the heaven the tide breaks
And from the ashes you will take your place
Here comes the comeback
This is your time your moment
The fire the fight you're golden
You've come so far keep going
Oh here comes the comeback
There is no mountain you can't face
There is no giant you can't take
All of your tears were not a waste
Your one step away
Just when they think they've got you game set match
Oh here comes the comeback
This is your time your moment
The fire the fight or golden
You've come so far keep going
Oh here comes the comeback
(Oh oh oh oh)
Your comeback
Your comeback
(Oh oh oh oh)
Oh oh
(Oh oh oh oh)
Your comeback
Your comeback
Oh oh oh
Here comes the comeback
(Oh oh oh oh)

Sometimes our problems and trials are short lived instances and other time like the first line says we go through a season of dark and dreary trials. Sometimes we pray and God answers right away and other times the purpose is to build our resilience levels to new heights to keep moving forward towards a Comeback. Instead of caving and giving in in the difficult times we need to tap into the fire inside and fight back to keep going. It is so easy to give up and blame God and others instead of keeping forward momentum.

The phrases: “There is no mountain you can't face, There is no giant you can't take, All of your tears were not a waste, .Your one step away” stand out to me. We see the mountain of the problem and freeze or become stuck with worry or fear. If we would only take a moment to breath and listen inside we could hear God remind us, “Step forward in faith you are just one step away!”. How many times do we stop one step away from victory because we are afraid of the mountain or giant of the problem facing us. That is the moment we need to go forward with the grit to know we can do it and move to the Comeback that is there for us.

Reflection: What one problem or difficulty you have faced or are now facing came to mind while listening to the song? What was the most important line in the song lyrics to you personally?

Overcoming for a Resilient Life

Photo credit: Ed Yourdon / Foter / Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

With this week close to Easter I was contemplating what to focus my blog on as I was sitting at my computer. I had been looking over some other books on the importance of reading when a song by Mandisa came to my mind as I was listening to her music. The song speaks to the importance of resilience. Having the inner fortitude to bounce back from the difficulties of life is the overcoming for a resilient person. We each have different difficulties and problems that try to keep us on the ground while resilience is telling us inside to not quit so we stand up and press on. Listen to the video of her song by clicking on the song title and think over the lyrics that point to the importance of the personal affirmation of “I am an Overcomer!”.

"Overcomer" performed by Mandisa (Click on title to view video of the song)

Staring at a stop sign Watching people drive by
T Mac on the radio Got so much on your mind
Nothing's really going right Looking for a ray of hope
Whatever it is you may be going through
I know He's not gonna let it get the best of you
You're an overcomer Stay in the fight ‘til the final round
You're not going under ‘Cause God is holding you right now
You might be down for a moment Feeling like it's hopeless
That's when He reminds You That you're an overcomer You're an overcomer
Everybody's been down Hit the bottom, hit the ground Ooh, you're not alone
Just take a breath, don't forget Hang on to His promises He wants You to know
The same Man, the Great I am The one who overcame death
He's living inside of You So just hold tight, fix your eyes
On the one who holds your life There's nothing He can't do He's telling you
(Take a breath, don't forget Hang on to His promises)
You're an overcomer You're an overcomer You're an overcomer
So don't quit, don't give in, you're an overcomer
Don't quit, don't give in, you're an overcomer
Don't quit, don't give in, you're an overcomer You're an overcomer

Photo credit: Nick Kenrick .HappyEaster /Passover. no protest / Foter / Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

When the rays of hope are slim in our life we blankly stare out at those passing us by thinking how do they have it so together when we feel beaten into the ground. If we only knew what they were going through we would not think like that. At those times the urge is to quit and give up, especially if we feel we are at rock bottom. It is at these times that we need to know that we don’t have to quit or give in. Understand that you can overcome the difficulties. How can we overcome?

Mandisa looks at life from the same worldview as I do, that of a Christian, so I know that is one reason she chose to sing this song. So the foundation of my overcoming is based on the focal point of who she is singing about -- the risen Savior Jesus. She alludes to His resurrection in the line, “The same Man, the Great I am The one who overcame death.” With this week being Easter that line may be one key reason I decided to use this song this week. I believe God’s purpose for my life is greater than the problems I face so that is important in my concept of having an overcoming mindset. I have had my share of times of being knocked down in life and wanting to stay down or even going lower. With the overcoming mindset I can keep my eyes fixed of Jesus Christ’s power that overcame death and knowing in serving Him he will lead and tell me what he wants for my life. That purpose God has for me is not giving into problems and quitting. Instead it points to overcoming and holding on to His greater purpose for my life.

The affirmation in this song to be an overcomer of course bridges beyond Christians. I remember when the song first came out there was a video that Mandisa did showing several well-known people who were battling cancer and other health problems and they were overcomers over their problems. So the general principle of the song relates to all people of all beliefs reminding us of the importance of not quitting but to overcome the problems that face us.

Another point I learned from the song came from the line “Staring at a stop sign Watching people drive by T Mac on the radio.” She is alluding to Tobey Mac with the term T Mac. His music is very upbeat and positive with a strong spiritual message. The phrase stood out to me reminding me of the power of positive music when difficult days are facing us. When you are going through difficult times it may be of help to listen to some uplifting music to remind you to get up and not quit.

Reflection: What personal affirmations do you remind yourself of when you are facing low “ray of hope” days? Do you have a favorite Overcoming Bible verse or motivational quote that helps you when you hit the ground? Do you have a favorite song that helps perk you up on down days?

Resilience: Keeping Your Eyes On Your Goals

In one of my doctoral psychology classes I have been researching the topic of resilience. Resilience is that character trait that helps individuals survive and even thrive through the difficulties and hardships in life. It is something someone is -- not what someone does. In the research people are studied who thrive even though they have difficult backgrounds and challenges in life to see how they become successful. The question becomes why do some people thrive through hardships and others give up and quit becoming victims instead of victors?

As I was reading through journal articles on the topic a song from one of my daughter’s favorite musicians came to my mind. It is the song “Eye On It” by Toby Mac. The song speaks to some of the techniques that can help people be victors instead of victims in life. Take a few minutes to look over the lyrics and if you click on the title you can listen to the song and watch the lyrics in the video.

"Eye On It" by Toby Mac (Click on the title to activate the video)

Eye on it, eye on it Eye on it, eye on it Eye on it Eye on it Eye on it, eye on it
I set my eyes to the west, walkin' away from it all Reachin' for what lies ahead, I got my eye on it
I see my sweat hit the ground I put my foot in the block
This is the race of my life And I can’t wait for this shot

‘Cause I can feel the wind at my back Chest is pumpin' like a heart attack
Feet are moving and my mind is locked Pressin' on with everything I got
I got my eye on it I got my eye on it I got my eye on it Eye on it
I got my eye on the prize, I got my eye on it I got my eye on the prize, I got my eye on it
I got my eye on the prize, I got my eye on it I got my eye on it, and I will not quit
I got a new passenger to help me navigate the way So when my heart hits the floor I can recalibrate
I feel the deeper callin' me, all else is fadin' in the past So let me run in the race that I know is built to last

‘Cause I can feel the wind at my back Chest is pumpin' like a heart attack
Feet are moving and my mind is locked Pressing on I gotta take my shot
I got my eye on it I got my eye on it I got my eye on it Eye on it
I got my eye on the prize, I got my eye on it I got my eye on the prize, I got my eye on it
I got my eye on the prize, I got my eye on it I got my eye on the prize and I will not quit
(I will not quit, eye on it Eye on it, eye on it Eye on it, I will not quit)

The analogy seen in the song is clearly that of a race. Runners are often very resilient as they understand the need for discipline. They put hours of work and sweat into daily practice of running whether they are sprinters or marathon runners. A runner is not going to win the race or a medal if they spend most of their time lying around surfing the internet and Face booking while constantly snacking on chips and Cola. A runner who lives like that will be lost in a trail of dust. A runner who is serious is disciplined. So to be resilient in life there needs to be an emphasis on living a disciplined life and know what you want out of this life takes work not slacking and snacking.

Then there is the repetition of the phrase “Eye on it” and “Eye on the prize”. Resilient people have a focus on their goals. Keeping their eyes set on what they are aiming for. Like a runner they keep pressing forward to their finish line of their goal. Even though they feel the pressure around them and inside of them they do not quit or give up until they cross the finish line. To be a victor you do not give up and quit but keep running the race.

On a grander scale Toby Mac is a Christian musician so I know since I come from the same worldview, the race he is speaking of is that of sunning the spiritual race of becoming more Christ like. I see in his lyrics a close semblance to the Apostle Paul’s writing in:

I Corinthians 9:24 “Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.”

Philippians 3:14 “I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.”

The Apostle Paul used the race analogy to remind early Christians that this life is about a race of grace in spreading the Good News of Christ while we pass through this quick journey on Earth. So that is the main point Toby Mac is speaking to. Yet from my research over the weeks on increasing resilience in individuals the thoughts from the song of -- discipline, focus, keeping eyes on the goals relate well to ways to help all people move from being victims of life’s problems and hardships to becoming victors.

Reflection: How is the race you are on this year going? What are you focused on in your life? If you feel like quitting what can you refocus on to keep pressing on?

Self-Discipline Our Attitude Behind A Resilient Life

To be able to progress through the difficulties of life and live the best life possible we need not look to politicians for solutions. In living the continual spiraling upwards journey of living a more than ok life we need to grow in self-discipline. Speaker and author Brian Tracy says this of self-discipline, “With self-discipline, the average person can rise as far and as fast as his talents and intelligence can take him. But without self-discipline, a person with every blessing of background, education and opportunity will seldom rise above mediocrity.”

Merriam Webster defines self-discipline as “correction or regulation of oneself for the sake of improvement”. It is not playing the victim instead it is understanding that life is difficult but also has many possibilities for good. With self-discipline we each learn that with personal effort we can learn and grow to reach the best life for ourselves. Before going further I would like you to watch this short video from Simple Truths about some ideas by Brian Tracy:

The Power of Discipline (click on the title to view the article and think over what he is stating about self-discipline).

I just want to touch on a couple of the areas he mentions in the video. I want to mention the last area he mentions first. That is self-discipline helps with our sense of responsibility in life. To be resilient in the hard times of life we need to understand we are responsible for what ultimately happens to us in our life journey. Otherwise we see ourselves as victims waiting for someone to blame or bail us out. Sad to say too many today are hoping for the government to bail them out. There is a lack of personal responsibility in the populace in these times. It does not help that in the highest levels of government no one takes responsibility for the problems we face as a nation. For example the Benghazi attack that killed four honorable men with one being an Ambassador was just covered up with a lie about a silly, poorly produced video. Any thinking person knowing that the killings took place on 9-11 and with the Libyan leadership openly saying it was terrorists knew the rightful blame should have pointed to the current administration. But with an election going on responsibility went out the window and cover-up lies worked better for their re-election purpose. Months later the out-going Secretary’s response to the video lie was “What does it matter!”. How can we promote responsibility for a better life when national leadership is not responsible instead blames and makes excuses!
Do we then just give up and let the culture and people facing difficulties crash and burn? No, we need to hold forth the power of self-discipline and encourage people to be responsible to change their course in life with wise choices. I have always liked how Scott Peck’s famous book, The Road Less Traveled, starts out with “Life is difficult”. That is the truth but life is also filled with joy and beauty and great opportunities if we work hard and make wise choices.

The other area Tracy brings up that I feel is of utmost importance is item number one in the video which is the importance of goals. Without clear concrete goals of what we want to accomplish in life and a thought out strategy to reach them we just meander through life aimlessly. This often leads to a victim blame first mentality. Writing down our goals gives us direction for the success we want to reach. Self-discipline comes in and energizes us to take the effort to think through what we want to accomplish. We need to write down the future goals we visualize in our minds. I mention writing out a strategy or plan to reach the goal because if we do not have a plan of practical steps in reaching our goals they are nothing more than a wish. Goal plan steps will help in staying focused on reaching the goals we truly want to accomplish.

The choice is up to each of us as to how our life will be played out. Granted uncontrolled circumstances do intervene that is one way life is difficult. Even in those times we are then responsible to adjust and adapt our goal strategies to the circumstances. We can’t just play victim and point fingers of blame as our national leaders often do. Keep going back to your vision of what you want for your life. Keep pushing resiliently forward with self-discipline holding firmly to your personal faith and values to have your best life possible.

Reflection: What was the most important point to you in the Brian Tracy video – The Power of Discipline? Where are you at on the spectrum line between that of self-discipline or being a victim? Write down 3 goals you want to accomplish this year and write 3 commitment steps for each goal, you plan to follow to help reach the goals. If you want more information on the Brian Tracy video you can order his book, The Power Of Discipline at www. simpletruths.com

Hold That Line To Your Victory

Having a presentation coming up at a conference I was looking for a Todd Rundgren song to play and came across his greatest hits CD on sale. As I was listening to the cd the song, Just One Victory, came on. Then I went to YouTube to watch a few of the videos pertaining to the song. I noticed in the comments several people who were battling with cancer or addictions had used the song as a motivator for their struggle. This is one reason over the years I appreciated and enjoyed Todd Rundgren’s songs. Of course there is his amazing musicianship and talent but his messages in the songs he writes have a positive feel about them. Well -- there is Bang On The Drum All Day. I am unsure of the philosophical message behind that.

Just One Victory is a great song looking at the issue of Resilience. There are thoughts of battling with weakness and struggles in life. With true perseverance and prayin’ there is no sign of giving up or giving in. As usual take time to listen to the song and meditate on the lyrics before going further. As you click on the title I have embedded a live concert link of Todd Rundgren and his band performing the song.

Just One Victory by Todd Rundgren (click on the title)

We've been waiting so long. We've been waiting for the sun to rise and shine
Shining still to give us the will, Can you hear me, the sound of my voice?
I am here to tell you I have made my choice
I've been listening to what's been going down There's just too much talk and gossip going 'round
You may think that I'm a fool but I know the answer
Words become a tool, anyone can use them Take the golden rule, as the best example
Eyes that have seen will know what I mean
The time has come to take the bull by the horns We've been so downhearted, we've been so forlorn
We get weak and we want to give in But we still need each other if we want to win
Hold that line, baby, hold that line Get up boys and hit 'em one more time
We may be losing now but we can't stop trying So hold that line, baby, hold that line
If you don't know what to do about a world of trouble You can pull it through if you need to And if you
believe it's true, it will surely happen Shining still to give us the will
Bright as the day, to show us the way Somehow, someday
We need just one victory and we're on our way Prayin' for it all day and fightin' for it all night Give us
just one victory, it will be alright We may feel about to fall but we go down fighting
You will hear the call if you only listen Underneath it all we are here together shining still

From the beginning phrase “We've been waiting so long We've been waiting for the sun to rise and shine” along with other phrases; “We've been so downhearted, we've been so forlorn” “We get weak and we want to give in”. I see the picture of people going through struggles, cancer, addictions, and depressions make people feel this way. The sense of waiting and wondering if the sun will ever shine again in their lives. I have had those times in my life. As I stated many of the YouTube comments related to cancer patients and addicts but I believe those going through the grief process of losing a loved one can find encouragement in this song. Any of these struggles make the person going through them think with a forlorn heart, “Is it worth going on??” “Maybe I should just give up and give in?”

That is where I appreciate the football analogy that comes in – “We get weak and we want to give in But we still need each other if we want to win Hold that line, baby, hold that line Get up boys and hit 'em one more time We may be losing now but we can't stop trying So hold that line, baby, hold that line.” Those lines made me reminisce back to high school days back in Barberton, Ohio being in the marching band during football season. I could visualize in my mind the crowd shouting, “Hold That Line, Hold that line.” Think of the analogy. If a football team is down by two touchdowns at halftime. Does the coach tell the team during the break, “Boys, you look pretty tired and we are behind. Let’s just give up and call it a night. I will tell the other coach we give up. There was a good movie on tv I wanted to see anyway!” No way! He motivates them with “The time has come to take the bull by the horns…” and “we still need each other if we want to win”. “We need just one victory at the beginning of the second half to get us going now go do it!!!” When going through life struggles we need to be our own coaches giving that kind of a pep talk. It also helps if you surround yourself with friends that can give you that kind of pep talk as well. The key to resilience is to keep on fighting for that victory!

We need to be disciplined and do our part, but as you know from my Christian worldview, I believe there is a spiritual element to our battles. I do not know if Todd Rundgren meant it this way, but with my spirit colored glasses I want to point out a few spiritual ideas I see in the song to consider. From the very beginning I see it with the phrase, “We've been waiting for the sun to rise and shine. Shining still to give us the will.” Granted physical sunny days can brighten our moods but does the physical sun give us the will to go on. From my view the Son, Jesus Christ gives us the will to go on through the battle or struggle. Of course to someone else reading this blog the phrase may relate to another spiritual force. I am just stating where I come from.
The same spiritual idea for me is found later in the song, “You can pull it through if you need to And if you believe it's true, it will surely happen Shining still to give us the will” If you believe it is true makes me think of the principle of faith and belief that is vital for our relationship and walk with God. The light of the Son continues to shine to give us the will to continue the fight. Right after those phrases is the phrase “Prayin for it all day”. Prayer is an instrument to being resilient in life’s trials for those who believe in a spiritual side to this life journey. We need to work hard for the victory and pray hard for the victory.
The last spiritual element I wish to point out is his mention of the Golden Rule early in the song. Todd Rundgren says, “Take the golden rule, as the best example” as to show us how to act as we fight through the struggle we may be facing. It is not do whatever it takes to win, instead it is act in an ethical manner. In Mathew 7:12 Jesus states, “So in everything, Do to others, what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the law and the prophets.” Living that life helps us keep relationships strong through the difficulties of life. Words are easy -- it is the actions that are important.

In the end how we deal with our life struggles comes down to our choice as Rundgren states in the song, “I am here to tell you I have made my choice.” To gain that just one victory we need to make the choice not to give up in the middle of the game.

Reflection: Think over a victory you had in your past. What actions did you do to win the struggle? Who helped you during this time? Are you battling with something in your life right now? How are you going to hold the line to gain your just one victory?

New Attitude for Resilience in Life

Recently in our family exercise time we have been using some new dvd’s from Leslie Sansone’s Walk at Home program. The titles are Walk Slim Fast & Firm 4 Really Big Miles and Walk Slim 5 Really Big Miles. Both are a good work out where you can do all the miles or portions. She always uses upbeat positive music and in these two dvds one song stood out to me. It is New Attitude that was popularized by Patti Labelle in the late 1980’s.

The song musically is a high energy song that carries a positive vibe to it. I had never really listened to it other that catching the main phrase “New Attitude”. So I looked it up online and looked over the lyrics. I thought of the word resilience as soon as I looked at the lyrics. Resilience is that inner ability that helps when you are at a seemingly dead-end; to not give up but to keep on going by finding a new way – a new attitude. Take some time first to look over the lyrics I have printed for you. As always click on the title if you wish to activate a video of the song to hear it.

New Attitude performed by Patti Labelle

Written by Sharon Robinson;Jonathan Gilutin;Bunny Hull

Runnin' hot, runnin' cold
I was runnin' into overload, it was extreme
I took it so high, so low
So low, there was nowhere to go like a bad dream

Somehow the wires uncrossed, my tables were turned
Never knew I had such a lesson to learn

I'm feelin' good from my head to my shoes
Know where I'm goin' and I know what to do
I tidied it up my point of view I got a new attitude!

I'm in control, my worries are few 'Cause I've got love like I never knew
Ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo I got a new attitude!

I'm wearing a new dress, new hair
Brand new ideas, as a matter of fact I've changed for good
It must have been the cool night, new moon, slight change
More than to figure oh but I feel like I should, yes

Somehow the wires uncrossed, my tables were turned
Never knew I had such a lesson to learn

I'm feelin' good from my head to my shoes
Know where I'm goin' and I know what to do
I tidied it up my point of view
I got a new attitude

I'm in control, my worries are few
'Cause I've got love like I never knew
Ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo
I got a new attitude
Ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo

Somehow the wires uncrossed, my tables were turned
Never knew I had such a lesson to learn

I'm feelin' good from my head to my shoes
Know where I'm goin' and I know what to do
I tidied it up my point of view
I got a new attitude

I'm in control, my worries are few 'Cause I've got love like I never knew
Ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo I got a new attitude


From my head to my shoes I'm loving you (I got a new attitude)

I got a new, new attitude! Everything about be has changed
Baby I ain't the same (I got a new attitude!)

Oh I got a new, I got a new I got a brand new, brand new
I got a new attitude


We all at one time or another have life events that drive our emotions to the extremes of hot or cold. Events, where, we come to a dead end. Maybe it is a dream we had where the tables are now turned and we see a nightmare instead. It may be a relationship or a job that has fallen through. At those times we are so low as to feel in our attitude that there is no way to proceed. The failure is too much and the wires that energize are life have been short circuited. We can let worries take over and have a negative attitude that everything is out of control so we better give up on life. That is the picture I see from the beginning of the song. The sad thing is that some people choose to live in the bad dream of their nightmare attitude for the rest of their lives.

The good news is that times of failure do not make us failures for life. We can choose a new attitude. We can look at the failure and seek to learn lessons to improve and change our dreams and goals. We have been created to be resilient and move forward from dead-ends with new attitudes. The phrase “I tidied up my point of view” is an important phrase. To bounce back from failure and troubles we need to do an attitude check and reevaluate our next play in the game of life. I like how the song says “from my head to my toes”. Our positive attitude change has to affect our whole being to be successful.

On the issue of control we can never be fully in control. But in an attitude check, we need to look at what we can control and change for the better and prayerfully leave what we can’t control up to God. In doing this we keep worries to a limit and can keep moving forward with the positive energy we see this song is about. A new attitude gives us a positive feeling about the direction in which we are then moving. So if you are going through difficulties that have brought your attitude to a new low. Take some time for an attitude check and make a choice to change it from your head to your toes.

Reflection: Take 10 minutes to reflect on your life journey. Do an attitude check. Are you feeling low or at a dead-end? Brainstorm ideas for new directions and choose to step out with a positive energetic new attitude. Listen to this song for a few days and see if the melody and words energize your life.

Living A Life Of Noble Purpose

This past week I had a nuclear stress test and the instructions had a suggestion to bring something to read as the whole process takes several hours. Much of that time is waiting between pictures of the heart at rest and after being on the treadmill. So I noticed in my books to read pile was a small book, Noble Purpose: The Joy of Living a Meaningful Life by William Damon. Dr. Damon is a Professor of Education at Stanford University. I took it to the Heart Clinic.

This book is a short book as I finished it during my time in the waiting room during the 3 ½ hours. Even though it was short, the impact of the message was very big in my thoughts. This is one of those books where I feel the world would be a better place if everyone would read it. I truly believe we are created as purpose driven. God has a purpose for each of us. So connecting our interests and God given strengths helps us to discover our career and non-career purposes in life.

I feel the core of his book is found in these statements by the author, “A life built around noble purpose is a life well spent….Commitment to a noble purpose, apart from the good that it produces for the world, endows a person with joy in good times and resilience in hard times.” (pgs. 66-67). That is what living more than ok is all about. In living a more than OK life we need to be following God’s purposes for our lives. What causes are important to you? How does the life you live impact your family and friends for the better?

That word “noble” in the title, I had never thought of before in relation to purpose in life. The author made me realize that we need to reflect over our purposes. My purpose does not have to be at the level of a hero or famous person. The key is -- are my purposes moral? Is my purpose just for selfishness of acquiring as much stuff I can store in my house or storage center? Is my purpose just about money? God centered purposes focus outward from the self to touch others’ lives for the better.

Near the end of the book, Dr. Damon presents 9 principles to help in our building a purpose filled life. I will paraphrase them here. First of all is to start with a purpose. Find an interest or cause you are passionate about and become involved. If you are having difficulty finding a purpose look at the close areas of your life as in your family, your church, social organizations, your career. Wherever you find most of your energy expended is a good place to find a purpose. Next, look for purpose driven examples in others that you can follow. These may be found in a mentor at your workplace or maybe a historical figure you have read about. Another good idea is to look for support from others. Share your purpose with others and see if anyone wants to join you. Or maybe your purpose in found in your religious faith sod in your local congregation you can find others to join you. With following your purpose be wary of perfectionism. There are always bumps along the way to discourage you. Don’t let discouragement defeat your purpose God has given you.

If you are counting -- the next is his sixth principle of keeping a humble heart in following your purpose. This fits well with his concept of noble purpose. To keep our spiritual compass on a moral plane, we need to keep our pride in check with humility. Along with humility then keep a focus on keeping your purpose noble by reviewing the means you are using to reach the goal of your purpose. This is counter culture in a world where the emphasis is use any means even immoral means of lying and cheating to gain your advantage. Staying noble is looking at the morality of your purpose journey from point A to point B. Number 8 is have a thankful heart of celebration for the purpose you are seeking to achieve. This allows for joy in the journey in what you are trying to accomplish in your career or other aspects of your life. Then the last principle is just as in point three, you should look for examples to follow. Principle 9 is be an example yourself to others. Disciple others, especially younger people, in living a purpose driven life so others can have “… a life well spent”.

There is much more than these 9 principles packed into this little powerful book. I again highly recommend it. But more importantly take time to look at your purposes for living your life journey.

Reflection: Take some time to think over what are purposes that are driving your life direction? What is your career purpose? Is it a noble purpose? Outside of your work do you have a purpose or do you just exist? Consider a purpose you would like to follow to have a more than ok life and write it down with plans to follow a purpose driven life.

Celebrating the Creativity of Beethoven

This past Friday our family enjoyed the music of Ludwig van Beethoven’s 8th and 9th Symphonies performed by the San Antonio Symphony orchestra. Our daughter had joined some former classmates who were attending so my wife and I took the occasion to attend as well. It was a fine evening of music and a time to enjoy the creativity of the musicians and the creativity of Beethoven the composer.

The orchestra started with the Symphony number 8 which was Beethoven’s shortest symphony. During this piece I listened to all the intricate musical details of the movements and began to marvel at Beethoven’s creative mind. This sense of marvel increased during the performing of his Symphony number 9 which was his last symphonic work and his most popular through the ages up to the present. It was the first symphonic work to make use of a human chorus. The chorus joins during the 4th movement. The lyrics that were used came from the Poem “Ode To Joy”, by Friedrich Schiller and selected excerpts by Beethoven:

Ode To Joy
O friends, no more these sounds! Let us sing more cheerful songs, More full of joy!
Joy, bright spark of divinity, Daughter of Elysium, Fire-inspired we tread Thy sanctuary. Thy magic power re-unites All that custom has divided, All men become brothers, Under the sway of thy gentle wings.

Whoever has created An abiding friendship, Or has won A true and loving wife, All who can call at least one soul theirs, Join our song of praise; But those who cannot must creep tearfully Away from our circle.

All creatures drink of joy At natures breast. Just and unjust Alike taste of her gift; She gave us kisses and the fruit of the vine, A tried friend to the end. Even the worm can feel contentment, And the cherub stands before God!

Gladly, like the heavenly bodies Which He sent on their courses Through the splendor of the firmament; Thus, brothers, you should run your race, like a hero going to victory!

You millions, I embrace you. This kiss is for all the world! Brothers, above the starry canopy There must dwell a loving father.

The symphony was completed in 1824 but in his notebooks it is seen that he was working on the piece from 1811. It is also known that he had wanted to write a musical piece that incorporated Schiller’s poem since 1793 when we was 22. The poem celebrates friendships and relationships. There is Joy in strong abiding friendships that we can count on being there with us in our life journey.

Back to my marveling at the creativity of Beethoven, while looking down from the balcony of the Majestic Theater listening to his Symphony number 9. I marveled at the variety in the four movements and how all the lines of music for the different instruments came out of one mind. He had to be able to hear in his mind the differing instrumental voices and the whole of the piece so that it was not just senseless noise. That has always amazed me about composers of orchestra symphonies and choral music. How they can write out the individual parts and when it fits together there is a unified music message expressed.

Another marvel about the piece is, that it is known from history that Beethoven was losing his hearing at this time. Concerning this there is the anecdote that when he was directing the premier of this Symphony number 9 he was completely deaf. So deaf, that when the piece was over he was still directing and a singer had to turn him around to see the crowds cheering as he could not hear them. What is amazing to me about this is his spirit of resilience. He could have given up on this piece by saying, “I can’t hear anymore so my love of music is done! I have written enough music so the masses should be happy with that. Poor, poor me as I really did want to do this piece about Schiller’s poem but it is impossible now!”. Resilience does not give in to impossibilities. This is just conjecture but maybe since he had a desire since age 22 to do a musical number about Schiller’s poem that helped as a driving force of inspiration, when otherwise it would have been natural to just give up composing. Listening to the San Antonio Symphony perform the Symphony number 9 I am glad he did not give up but continued with his creativity.

Reflection: Click on the these words - Beethoven’s Symphony number 9 and listen to the short video except of the symphony. Then read over the poem lyrics that I have above that inspired his musical piece. Write down in your journal the thoughts and feelings that come to mind.

Resilience And Knowing Our Limits

Resilience is that part of our being that keeps us going during the tough times. When we want to give up our resilience level is that inner voice that says don’t give up -- keep moving forward and upward. It helps us to bounce back when life throws us unexpected curveballs. We can through planning and goal setting control much of what life throws at us, but we can’t control everything. Resilience can give us the strength to keep plodding along the path instead of giving up.

We each have different difficulties on our journeys to test our resilience. In dealing with these difficulties part of resilience is knowing our limits and knowing when we need to ask for help. There is nothing wrong in asking for help. That help can come from our fellow travelers on life’s journey or Divine help as we call out to God for help.

Recently we as a family heard Matthew West in concert at a church in San Antonio. Many of his songs impacted me but one that stood out that evening was Strong Enough. Click on the title and listen to the song. You will find the video amazing.

Strong Enough by Matthew West

You must, You must think I'm strong, To give me what I'm going through

Well forgive me, Forgive me if I'm wrong, But this looks like more than I can do
On my own

I know I'm not strong enough to be, everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up , I'm not strong enough , Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be, Strong enough, Strong enough
For the both of us

Well maybe, Maybe that's the point, To reach the point of giving up

Cause when I'm finally, Finally at rock bottom, Well that's when I start looking up
And reaching out

I know I'm not strong enough to be, Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up ,I'm not strong enough , Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be, Strong enough, Strong enough

Cause I'm broken, Down to nothing, But I'm still holding on to the one thing
You are God, and you are strong, When I am weak

I can do all things, Through Christ who gives me strength, And I don't have to be
Strong enough, Strong enough

I can do all things, Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don't have to be, Strong enough Strong enough

I know I'm not strong enough to be, Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up, I'm not strong enough, Hands of mercy won't you cover me,
Lord right now I'm asking you to be, Strong enough, Strong enough, Strong enough.

The song reminded me of difficult days in Chicago after my mother had died, then shortly thereafter my oldest brother was diagnosed with cancer. He passed away months afterwards, wasting away to nothing in his final days. During that time of grief the company I worked for had a corporate takeover and I lost my job. Those were depressing days where like the song says I was at the point of giving up. This was a time when my resilience levels could not cope. I felt the strength of Christ by close friends at church filling in the gap. Also by holding onto the promises of God’s Word helped me to keep forward on the journey.

The song also reminded me of my volunteer work with a drug rehab center in Brownsville, Texas. Their groups used the 12 step program of Alcoholic Anonymous. If you work with addicts they know from their stories they had to hit rock bottom before seeking help. They will admit their turn around was only from God’s hand of grace reaching down to pull them up.

As you listened to the song and read over the lyrics did it remind you of past times of difficulties in your life. Maybe you are facing difficulties now – economic, health, broken relationships. Know that whatever you are facing you need to be open to know your limitations and reach for help. Maybe it is calling a friend to let them know what you are facing. Possibly you need to reach out to your local church or parish for help. Most importantly of all, I believe we need to reach out and understand Jesus Christ is there to give us strength enough for the difficulty we are facing.

Reflection -- Think over a past difficulty where you felt overwhelmed. In hindsight can you see how the Hand of God helped through the process whether through other people or in a miraculous happenstance occurrence. Also in these difficult days is there someone you know facing difficulties where you can be the hand of Christ by helping in love?

Surfing Through The Difficult Waters of Life

Recently our family saw the movie, Soul Surfer the weekend it came out. We went to it as we heard it was a true story and inspirational in nature. It is the true story of Professional surfer Bethany Hamilton. She is a young lady from a surfing family. One day while practicing she lost her left arm at age 13 in a random Tiger shark attack. In real life she was attacked October 31, 2003 by January 10, 2004, she bounced back, competed in a surfing competition and finished fifth place.

IT is a powerful story of resilience in the life of Bethany from losing her arm to not giving up and coming back to go on to be a professional surfer. The movie is based on a book that was written back when the tragedy occurred. The movie shows the range of emotions of her family and from Bethany. Being so passionate about the water and surfing it is understandable in a way to see her wanting to go back into surfing soon after having lost her arm. Then as she tries in a local tournament her failure catches the best of her and the disillusionment affects her life.

In the disillusionment period she goes with her youth pastor and youth group to help with the Indonesian Tsunami victims. Through this experience, in stepping back away from surfing it gave her perspective in seeing that without her arm she could still help. In this sequence there is a touching yet comical scene as she helps a little child overcome the fear of the water. Then coming back home she sees the mail from other handicapped people she had encouraged by competing in the local tournament where she felt she was a failure.

There are various elements in her life that reawaken the passion for surfing. With family support and hard work on her part she trains for another competition. Her family helps out in her training and she doubles up her discipline and work in training to do her best. She does well enough in the next competition to keep her drive going to where she is a now a Professional surfer.

Resilience is the bouncing back from hardship in our lives. IN this story her spiritual faith is seen as one element in her resilience. She has her share of doubts from the standpoint of why would God allow this when she is so passionate about surfing. Also seen just how the positive side her spiritual faith and her Mission work in Indonesia gives her hope and expanded purpose that even though losing her arm she is possibly more useful in touching people’s lives.

I would say her family is another element to resilience to help in her bouncing back. They were 100% behind her in whatever direction she wanted to take whether to stay in surfing or find something new. OF course they knew sea water was in her blood. It is touching to see her family cheering her practice on and then when she enters the competition.

The final element of resilience I see in the movie is her discipline and hard work shines through. This is so important and is so lost in our culture. Hard work is not emphasized. Just get noticed on a reality tv show or promote YouTube videos about yourself and lady luck is supposed to open the door for you according to the American idol culture we live in. IN reality it takes hard work and passion. Before the attack Bethany’s passion and hard work is seen and after the attack and she knows that surfing is what she really wants hard work and passion is seen again. These are two vital aspects of resilience if we want to succeed in what we are doing. The passion is the motivator of the hard work and discipline.

This is definitely a must see movie from the standpoint of a positive story and what we can learn from it to improve our lives. I could imagine the change in peoples’ lives regaining new drive for their passions if crowds were attending this movie. OF course that has not happened. The critics knowing it is a true story of a Christian have done all they could do in their power to stop people from watching it. The Village voice reviewer trashes it simply because she is a Christian. This was one of the more terrible reviews I have ever read as he is blantantly going against the film just because the Christian sentiment in it.. Any critical thinker watching the movie can see the director does not go over board on the Christian angle. It has to be there as that is who she is but it is not overtly sappy spirituality. Another famous reviewr was a little more mild in his review but again since she is a Christian harps on his opinion that the movie does not deal with real struggles and she seems to rebound too quickly in his viewpoint. Well it was her life not his. Plus I don’t know what movie he was watching as you see the turmoil of the parents and you see Bethany’s doubts as well. The truth is she did rebound quickly due to her youth, her family support, her faith, her passion and her discipline. All things we can all learn from. Reading the critics made me know why more people went to see a movie about a cartoon bunny that plays drums and a horror slasher film than Soul Surfer. Such a sad commentary on a society that definitely needs to hear the message and example of resilience in this film instead of brain dead cartoons and horror movies.

Reflection
What can we learn from a movie like this? Since I am a low risk taker one thing I immediately pick up on is this is another reason I would much prefer being in a swimming pool that going into the ocean with all kinds of dangerous creatures. But seriously think and reflect on a hardship time in your life. What did you learn from it and how did you bounce back? Then from the standpoint of after the first failure in coming back she took some time off to do a mission trip to Indonesia. We need to remember sometimes it is good to step back and try something different in your life to gain a new perspective.

Getting Back Up From Hardships

Part of life is the hardships that come our way. The hardships come in varying degrees of difficulty. Each one of us face different hardships: job loss, loved ones dying, affairs, divorce, relationship breakups, illnesses, harsh weather events, (tornadoes and hurricanes), accidents, and tragedies such as the recent shooting I mentioned in the last blog post. These are negative happenstance events that no one plans for. At least no one I know plans and desires tragedies in their lives.

When we are hit by hardships are emotions are overwhelmed. We feel like the world is crushing us. This happens due to the shock value of the event happening without our full expectation of it. Granted some things such as divorces, job loss, and deaths from long term illnesses are not sudden shocks but still the pain of sadness, depression and anxiety has a strong impact on us.

At these times when we are knocked down by life that is when our resilience can come into play. The dictionary defines resilience as an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change. We can bounce back up from hardships. We need not be completely crushed and debilitated from these events. It is natural to go through the “why me” stage and experience the negative emotions of what we are experiencing. But living a more than ok life means we move beyond the negative feelings to adjust on to a positive pathway.

I came across this song by musician Toby Mac which speaks to the importance of resilience in bouncing back and getting back up when life knocks us down. Click on the title of the song to hear a video of the song “Get Back Up” and reflect over what the song means to you.

Get Back Up Toby Mac

You turned away when I looked you in the eye
And hesitated when I asked if you were alright
Seems like you’re fightin’ for your life
But why, oh, why
Wide awake in the middle of your nightmare
You saw it comin’ but it hit you out of nowhere
And there’s always scars when you fall that far
We lose our way, we get back up again
It’s never too late to get back up again
And one day you gonna’ shine again
You may be knocked down, but not out forever
We lose our way, we get back up again
So get up, get up, you gonna’ shine again
It’s never too late to get back up again
You may be knocked down, but not out forever
You roll out of the dawning of the day
Heart racin’ as you made your little get away
It feels like you been runnin’ all your life
But why, oh, why
So you pull away from the love that would’ve been there
And start believin’ that your situation’s unfair
But there’s always scars when you fall that far
This is love callin,’ love callin,’
Out to the broken this is love callin’
This is love callin,’ love callin,’
I am so broken
This is love callin,’ love callin’

In the song, words and phrases that relate to hardships and tragedies in my view were “middle of your nightmare” and “hit you out of nowhere”. Often on news stories about earthquakes or tornadoes people will describe the aftermath as like a nightmare. Being hit out of nowhere is the experiential feeling we have as if the wind is knocked out of you as you hear of an affair of someone you trust. Also many going through hardships, bear scars that may always be with them or take a long time to heal.

The positive phrases that speak to bouncing back from hardships are “So get up, get up, you gonna’ shine again” and “You may be knocked down, but not out forever”. It is true during hard times we are knocked down. But do we need to stay down? No, we can get back up again. Although the darkness surrounding us in the hard times feel like an eternity as the song says we will shine again. Often we shine brighter afterwards as we build up our inner self and grow in resilience ability for future hardships.

There is a spiritual element I believe to going through hardships and that is what Toby Mac is speaking of in the phrase, “This is love callin”. Sometimes in the hard times we feel alone and make ourselves more alone by pulling away from others. We become too caught up with “This is not fair” thinking. In that broken thinking we need to understand and be open to God calling to us with His love. Be open to the love of others He places around us.

I think through the hard times I have had in my life journey. I would never wish any of those times on anyone. But I can say each time I have bounced back and learned new aspects of my life journey in the process. Sometimes it took me longer to “Get back up again” and the hardest times, thankfully I had friends nearby to encourage me and often felt God’s presence during the time.

Reflection:
Think through a time of hardship you had. Write down what happened and what feelings you went through. How did you bounce back and who all was involved in the process? Fast forward past the event. Write down an event where you felt life was shining for you after the time of hardship. Be thankful for that shining time.