Winning The War On Drugs By Saying Yes To Positive Addictions

Recently I heard on the news an update that the Mexican Drug War death toll is now over 47,000. That made me curious to search drug related deaths in this country. I found at drugwarfacts.org that the number of drug related deaths in the USA during 2009 were over 37,000. Those numbers sickened me when I consider that it is all so senseless. The Mexican side deaths bother me as I lived in the Border Town of Brownsville, Texas for the past 10 years. I remember speaking with university students who came across the border for classes and they spoke of the fear of the kidnappings and random shooting violence from the cartels. Those deaths relate to the insatiable appetite for drug use in this country and the growing addiction problem that accompanies it. In my opinion those who use illegal drugs and support the use have the blood of these people on their hands.

Who are these supporters of drug use? A 2008 study(1), by a Professor at University of California , Berkeley showed a 6 fold increase in the glamorizing of drug use in Rap music from the 1970’s to the 1990’s. The Drug Testing Network discusses research that show teens are bombarded in TV shows , movies , and in the lives of their favorite celebrities that drugs are harmless and fun. Then there is always the common phrase “Drugs, Sex, and Rock n Roll” coined in a song by Ian Drury, an early founder of the punk rock music scene in Great Britain that reminds us that drugs have long been a big part of that music genre. Sad to say many of these promoters of drug use have been in and out of drug rehab or have died from drug usage.

Many supporters of drug use point to the failure of the “Just Say No” campaign years ago. They say it never made that big of an impact on drug use and as we have seen with the news on the drug war in Mexico; drug use does continue to climb. The problem I believe was with emphasizing just saying “No”. That usually never works. Just ask a parent with a little child. Say “don’t touch that” and what happens is that the child touches it. I believe we could stop the Mexican Drug war and the senseless drug deaths here in the U.S. if we would encourage people to say “Yes”. Not yes to drugs but to alternatives.

Dr. William Glasser in his book Positive Addiction turns the thought of addiction upside down. He points out that the word addict is thought of in the negative context of a life destroyed by drugs or alcohol. A person is weakly dependent on the substance to cope or escape from life’s difficulties in search of happiness. In helping someone give up alcohol or drugs the drug should be replaced with something to fill the void, otherwise relapse quickly occurs. Dr. Glasser promotes, that to fully strengthen people they need to build a positive addiction in their life. Find something that they enjoy doing to bring happiness into their lives. Some of the positive addictions he points out in the book are meditation, sports, music and other art forms.

He points out from his research that “…positive addiction increases your mental strength and is the opposite of a negative addiction which seems to sap the strength from every part of your life except the area of the addiction.”(pg39). If you think about it he is so right. Drug addicts are consumed by their addiction. There is often a negative effect in their work, health, and relationships. You don’t hear of someone with a positive addiction of gardening going on a 72 hour binge of tending to their rose garden and not being able to function in their work because they enjoy planting flowers. Positive addictions help to round out our lives so as to help us function better is other areas of our lives.

Dr. Glasser’s thoughts on Positive Addiction coincides well with an organization called Natural High . If every American would go to www.naturalhigh.org and consider building a Positive Addiction into their personal life there would be no more drug war here in the U.S. The Drug Cartels in Mexico would be out of business. People would then understand they don’t have to ingest chemicals by smoking, snorting, or shooting up with needles to find happiness and relaxation in life. The personal destruction could end if we all could see that through positive personal interests such as relationships, sports, arts, nature, spirituality we can satisfy the human experiential needs for happiness and relaxation with natural highs that come from positive addictions.

Natural High was founded by Jon Sundt, who experienced the death of two of his brothers due to drug use. This life experience impacted him to make a difference to try to stop the destructive force of drugs in the lives of people. Personally, I relate to his experience, as I never tried drugs although they were readily available in the 1970’s in my high school. That is because I saw my oldest brother, Paul, struggle first with alcohol addiction and then drug addiction so thankfully it never appealed to me. Mr. Sundt started his organization that primarily targets school age children through high school. They provide testimonials of sport and music celebrities, who can be considered real role models. They share how through their personal “natural highs” they enjoy life. They also point out how their success is due to not using drugs. These testimonials show drugs are not needed to enjoy life like the lies of rappers and Hollywood media stars who try to delude teens that drugs are exciting and the best way to really experience life. To me the Natural high website can be viewed by people of all ages to gain insight into the importance of finding a positive addiction to make their life more fulfilling. For myself, my positive addictions are my Christian faith, my family, reading, playing guitar, listening to music, and enjoying nature.

Reflection: List your positive addictions that help you have a natural high in life. Take time to journal why these are important to you and how did you get started with doing these things in your life.

1. http://berkeley.edu/news/media/releases/2008/04/01_rapmusic.shtml

Becoming A Noticer

How often do we notice what is going on around us in the world and people’s lives? At the end of the year I read a fiction book, The Noticer, by Andy Andrews . My wife heard Andy speak at a Women Of Faith conference in November. Andy Andrews has a gift of being a great story teller. In the start of this book the reader is quickly caught up in the story so it is a book that is hard to put down.

The book’s key figure, Jones, keenly shows up in a person’s life during a time of difficulty. While reading, I debated in my mind whether Jones is a figure of a Guardian Angel or Jesus as he often appears out of nowhere and disappears afterwards. Also the various ethnicities in the book perceive Jones as being of their ethnicity. The importance of the book in my viewpoint is Jones’ improving the moral character of the people he is in contact with.

A driving point of the book is that of our attitude in relating to problems that face us. Jones also emphasizes our attitudes are shaped by our perception. A common example of the power of perception is the glass half full or half empty? Our choices we make are being guided by our attitudes and perceptions. Our perceptions in our daily journey can lead to a negative cast down spirit or to a positive spiraling up outlook on life.

Jones is the “Noticer” in the book as he is a watcher of people and notices when they need help. This is a thread in the book that caught my attention as I move into the New Year. The concept relates well with living life mindfully aware. If I am a Noticer, God can use me more through each day in making me notice people He is bringing into my daily journey for the purpose of being His hands and heart to help them. We may seek to serve God by helping others but then become caught up in unaware living so we do not notice the needs that are actually around us. This is where Jones as the Noticer, can help us understand the importance of being aware of how life is playing out around us.

There was something else I relearned in the initial interaction of Jones with another lead character, who was definitely a glass half empty in his perception of life. The importance of learning from historical figures is a lesson Jones teaches the other lead character when he is young. In his initial contact with Jones, as homework the teen is handed biographies of Winston Churchill, Will Rogers, George Washington Carver. The young man’s perspective of this idea was “boring history books”, but Jones’ perspective was these were opportunities to look at adventures of great people and learn what made them great.

The young man soon found out that reading these books were interesting and not boring. So Jones gave him other biographies: Joan of Arc, Abraham Lincoln, Victor Frankl, Harry Truman, Florence Nightingale, King David, Harriet Tubman, Queen Elizabeth I, John Adams, Eleanor Roosevelt, Mark twain, Joshua Chamberlain, George Washington, Anne Frank, and Christopher Columbus. In reading these books he saw what Jones was getting at; that positive values could be learned from the lives of great people as they were people just like him. If they were great he could be great too.

Stories of people’s lives can be powerful influencers to learn from to better our own life. As I look at the list Jones recommended there are several I have read and appreciated and learned from. The list also gave me ideas of lives I want to read about in the coming year.

Being a Noticer, as seen in this book, means being open to be an active helper for lives in my sphere of life. Jones did not notice just for people-watching sake. He noticed so he could come along someone struggling in life and help change their perspective so to help them grow to be a better person.

Reflection: Try being a Noticer today. See if there is an opportunity to help a family member, friend or even a stranger during your daily journey today.At the end of the day take a few moments to journal thoughts on the experience of helping someone as to how it felt and how did you happened to notice the need to step into the other person’s struggle.

Spreading Joy By Giving At Christmas

Each Christmas Season brings new memories and new lessons learned. A thread that came through this season is that part of the Joy of Christmas is in giving. Giving touches upon the true meaning of Christmas in God sending His son to the world as the greatest gift. There were many ways this came to mind this year and I will simply touch on a few ways that stood out to me.

Recently as a family we went to a concert of the Tran Siberian Orchestra for their Winter tour. If you ever have the opportunity to see them in concert they put on an amazing performance. Their talent as artists and performers is superb. (Click on this sentence to hear a short video of their music). We thoroughly enjoyed the sights and sounds of their music and light show. What does this have to do with giving as we were on the receiving end? Well, something else I appreciate about the Trans Siberian Orchestra is their performance always tells a story. As I listened intently to the mesmerizing voice of the narrator and the lyrics of the singers the message became clear. The story was emphasizing one important part of Christmas was that of giving and being open to give to strangers in their time of need. They were also getting across that this aspect of Christmas should be a year round lifestyle change in us. So we went to the concert simply to enjoy their music but came away with an important lesson as well.

During the Christmas season as I shop, I am also reminded of the importance of giving as I hear the familiar bells of the Salvation Army. They are a Christian based organization that does so much good around the world. By placing spare change into the red kettles it is a way to give to the needy that the Salvation Army helps.

Then a few days ago while my wife and daughter went shopping, I spent the day baking small gingerbread cakes and Christmas cookies. From the memory side of Christmas there is nothing better than baking cookies while listening to Holiday music. Since we are new in the neighborhood I thought of making up plates of cookies and giving them to our neighbors who we are still getting to know. When they came back from shopping my wife helped me plate the cookies which you see at the top of this column. She creatively wrapped them up with plastic wrap and red and green ribbon so they were ready for delivery.

Christmas Eve morning I walked them around to our surrounding neighbors. I could see joy in their eyes as their gazed at the decorated tray of baked goods. Who would think that giving a simple tray of cookies would brighten someone’s life? We hope in the New Year to know these neighbors better.

Reflection: What are some ways you practice giving during the Holidays? As you look into the New Year are there ways you can keep Christmas alive by giving through out the year?

Savoring Fall in Texas

The diverse colors of the Fall season is one aspect of the Chicago area my wife and I had missed in our living in the Texas, Rio Grande Valley. I’ve never missed the bone chilling snowy Winters of Chicago, but Fall is a season I missed. There is a relaxing freshness for the spirit in taking a Saturday stroll through Lincoln Park with the trees full of a mixture yellow, oranges, and red leaves. Or driving up through Southern Wisconsin and viewing the changing colors of creation. In Brownsville we missed the diversity of the seasons.

With our move up to New Braunfels we noticed Maple trees in our neighborhood and with plum trees in our yard we thought we might be able to enjoy Fall again. A week ago we took a weekend to go to nearby Lost Maples State Park . We rented a cabin that overlooked the Frio River in Leakey, Texas. The drought had taken its toll on the river yet in the area where our cabin was the water was so clear we could see the catfish and turtles swimming.

On early Saturday morning we went over to Lost Maples. It was sprinkling lightly so we worried that would hinder us taking photographs. As we started up one of the trails, by then it had stopped raining. After about a quarter of a mile we came to an open field area that was perfect for photographs. The colors in the maples were spectacular oranges, yellows, and reds. The rest of the hike gave us a good healthy workout. I was thankful that it was a cooler day as we walked the miles of the hike.

Savoring is deeply soaking in experiences as you are going through them. It is taking time to reflect on the present moment so as to imbed the moment into our memory. When we are savoring, it often also brings up corresponding memories. The time at Lost Maples with my family and taking photos that afternoon allowed me to reflect on memories of Fall trips when I was young in Ohio to the various state parks Ohio is noted for. Those were positive times with my mother, brother and family friends growing up. The colors also brought back memories of the many Fall weekend hikes in the Chicago area. Many a Saturday I would hike from Peterson Avenue on the far North side and follow the lakefront parks to the North Avenue Beach area.

Back at the cabin in the late evening I marveled at all the stars sparkling on the clear backdrop of a black cloud free night sky. It had been many years since I had seen so many stars. Then in the early morning I sat out on the cabins patio to read. I would glance up from the book listening to the sound of silence and marveling at the expanse of trees on the other side of the river. I breathed up a prayer of thankfulness to the Designer Creator behind all the beauty around me.

Taking short breaks to savor the wonder and beauty of nature helps to revive us from the humdrum boredom of life. Opportunities like these help to slow down our pace so we can savor new time moments with family and renew older memories that make life more meaningful. The voices in our minds can tell us we are too busy to take a break or we don’t have the money. We almost allowed those voices to stop us from going to Lost Maples. After the weekend experience we were glad that we made the choice to go and get away.

Reflection: Plan a getaway for yourself and your family -- even if it is a one day picnic at a park or beach. During the time use 20 to 30 minutes to soak in the experience and savor what getting away means for you.

Renewing The Spirit At A Counseling Conference

A week ago I had the opportunity to attend the Texas Counseling Professional Growth conference in Fort Worth, Texas. I have mentioned before, one reason I enjoy conferences is the life long learning experience of looking at new practices and theories. This year was a little different in that as the 2011 President of the Texas Career Development Association, my primary place at the conference was to be at our division booth and promote our association. This meant attending very little of the conference.

With Thanksgiving this week I do look back at that week and am thankful for the learning I was able to partake in. I am thankful God has given us minds to learn and grow through reading and learning from others. I will share in this blog post two learning sessions the deeply affected me.

They both occurred on Friday of the conference. The first one was very early. With coffee in hand, I went to the Counselor Prayer breakfast at 6:30 am. There were not many present that early in the morning, but the presenter shared insight on the importance of prayer that I felt was very timely in my life. She discussed the concept of “Centering Prayer” . This is meditative and reflective prayer of quietly reflecting for example on Galations 5:22& 23 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. “. Or you can pray a prayer of worship centered on an attribute of God. She mentioned this moves our prayers away from whiney, gimme, gimme prayers. Not that praying for people and things is wrong but the centered prayer I believe quiets our hearts and calms us to hear from God.
She used the analogy that life with its chaos, fear, sadness, and despair is like a hurricane. Centered prayer allows us to be at peace in the “Eye of the Storm”. The eye of the hurricane is where the air is calm and quiet. Having lived in an area that had hurricanes I could appreciate the analogy. Prayer does have that characteristic to take our spirits away from the rages of the storm to a quiet place in God’s presence.

After that early morning session I also was able to attend the Keynote speaker session with Dr. Bradford Keeney . Dr. Keeney is presently Professor of Marriage and Family Therapy and Hanna Spyker Eminent Scholars Chair in Education, University of Louisiana, Monroe campus. Over the years he has studied healers, shamans, and medicine men around the world in a variety of cultures.

In his presentation Dr. Keeney rightly pointed out that modern Psychology and Counseling relies too much on techniques and theories and neglects what he called the complexity and mystery of the Divine. The sterile secular mindset tries to explain everything and puts everything into categories and stereotypes. He emphasized Counselors can learn from the ancient healers. Be open to the Spirit. That we gotta have a song in our soul. He brought up the importance of rhapsodic expression of poetry and music. In doing this he went into a beatnik type or rap like poetry expression of his message. I found drawn to his creativeness in his presentation. To help people we do need to tap into creativity and realize that counseling has an art form element to it.

A couple of points that made an impression on me was his mentioning of the Irving Mills song, “It Don’t Mean A Thing If It Ain’t Got That Swing” . Click on the title to hear a video of it. Dr. Keeney was trying to get across that the healing process is helping people re-energize their lives. Not living ok existence, but the liveliness and energy and power of the Spirit which is found in the analogy of jazz and spiritual music. Keeping with his music analogy he presented the idea that Counseling needs more song and feeling. Don’t just interpret a technique, instead swing and rap with the individual needs of the person seeking help.

Dr. Keeney at another point began to sing the children spiritual song. “This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.” This was a reminder that our purpose in our lives, and in our practice as Counselors is to make the world a brighter place. Life is not about getting things and living complacent ok lives. Instead life is about giving and shining light on the darkness in people’s lives.

So although at this conference I spent quite a bit of time at our TCDA booth the sessions I was able to attend impacted my life in challenging how I can shine my light and be more centered in the spiritual aspect of my life.

Reflection: How are you shining your light in your world to make it a better place? Do you have an inner song that inspires your life?

Happenstance, Choices and Our Career Journey

With the course for freshman college students I teach at a local college, a major ending project is looking at their career choice. I try to let them know that many things in life shape our career journey. It is not just taking a career test and out pops the perfect career. Also for most of them right out of High School, I let them know that they are looking at an initial starting point for their career journey. They will find themselves expanding into other areas in the future.

Recently, I was on one my favorite websites www.naturalhigh.org and on their online tv link watched a video of Josh Landan. Take a few minutes and watch it here www.naturalhigh.tv/ They have several videos but presently Josh’s is the first one.

I showed this to my college students this semester as it starts off showing his initial passion at 18 to be a videographer. His passion can be picked up in the comment that he came across as a stalker. Also the manner he speaks and the light in his eyes you can see his love for filming. I love seeing people following their passion be it in their vocation or avocation. A passion gives us purpose and meaning as well as enjoyment in life. So I encourage people to seek out an area they are passionate about. Especially students I work with I try to encourage them to find a passion to tap into.

Listening to Josh I also see Dr. Krumboltz’s, concept of Happenstance as well, (I have spoken of his concept of happenstance and creating our own luck in the past). Josh had a surfing videographer he looked up to in Taylor Steele. At one point in his life he had a chance to meet him. With that chance, he took the risk of a choice to see if he could work with him. It worked out that he could work with Taylor Steele, and from the flow of his story it was a positive turning point. This turning point opened up his growth in filming as a career.

His filming progressed and he tells us of awards and success in his area of passion. Then at another juncture it is suggested that he try out managing athletes so he progresses on in his career journey to manage athletes. By then he is also directing films as well. From a career point of view he has opened up to greater levels than where he first began. Did he know this would happen when he was an 18 year old, stalking surfers with his camera? I am sure he would say no.

In the end he speaks to his wise choice to stay away from drug use. He mentions that this choice affected his career success. His type of work is more freelance in nature so he is self employed. He clearly states that if he went the drug route his life would have been wasted. You can’t run a successful business when drugs or alcohol are in control of your life. He could have chosen to follow peer pressure of drug use in his local area of Ventura, California. We see he did not make that choice. He chose to follow his passion and look for natural highs in his life.

Reflection: Journal how Josh’s video affected you. Did it remind you of important choices you have made in your career journey? Think over those happenstance items in your life that forced a choice in your career life and life in general.

Resilience And Knowing Our Limits

Resilience is that part of our being that keeps us going during the tough times. When we want to give up our resilience level is that inner voice that says don’t give up -- keep moving forward and upward. It helps us to bounce back when life throws us unexpected curveballs. We can through planning and goal setting control much of what life throws at us, but we can’t control everything. Resilience can give us the strength to keep plodding along the path instead of giving up.

We each have different difficulties on our journeys to test our resilience. In dealing with these difficulties part of resilience is knowing our limits and knowing when we need to ask for help. There is nothing wrong in asking for help. That help can come from our fellow travelers on life’s journey or Divine help as we call out to God for help.

Recently we as a family heard Matthew West in concert at a church in San Antonio. Many of his songs impacted me but one that stood out that evening was Strong Enough. Click on the title and listen to the song. You will find the video amazing.

Strong Enough by Matthew West

You must, You must think I'm strong, To give me what I'm going through

Well forgive me, Forgive me if I'm wrong, But this looks like more than I can do
On my own

I know I'm not strong enough to be, everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up , I'm not strong enough , Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be, Strong enough, Strong enough
For the both of us

Well maybe, Maybe that's the point, To reach the point of giving up

Cause when I'm finally, Finally at rock bottom, Well that's when I start looking up
And reaching out

I know I'm not strong enough to be, Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up ,I'm not strong enough , Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be, Strong enough, Strong enough

Cause I'm broken, Down to nothing, But I'm still holding on to the one thing
You are God, and you are strong, When I am weak

I can do all things, Through Christ who gives me strength, And I don't have to be
Strong enough, Strong enough

I can do all things, Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don't have to be, Strong enough Strong enough

I know I'm not strong enough to be, Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up, I'm not strong enough, Hands of mercy won't you cover me,
Lord right now I'm asking you to be, Strong enough, Strong enough, Strong enough.

The song reminded me of difficult days in Chicago after my mother had died, then shortly thereafter my oldest brother was diagnosed with cancer. He passed away months afterwards, wasting away to nothing in his final days. During that time of grief the company I worked for had a corporate takeover and I lost my job. Those were depressing days where like the song says I was at the point of giving up. This was a time when my resilience levels could not cope. I felt the strength of Christ by close friends at church filling in the gap. Also by holding onto the promises of God’s Word helped me to keep forward on the journey.

The song also reminded me of my volunteer work with a drug rehab center in Brownsville, Texas. Their groups used the 12 step program of Alcoholic Anonymous. If you work with addicts they know from their stories they had to hit rock bottom before seeking help. They will admit their turn around was only from God’s hand of grace reaching down to pull them up.

As you listened to the song and read over the lyrics did it remind you of past times of difficulties in your life. Maybe you are facing difficulties now – economic, health, broken relationships. Know that whatever you are facing you need to be open to know your limitations and reach for help. Maybe it is calling a friend to let them know what you are facing. Possibly you need to reach out to your local church or parish for help. Most importantly of all, I believe we need to reach out and understand Jesus Christ is there to give us strength enough for the difficulty we are facing.

Reflection -- Think over a past difficulty where you felt overwhelmed. In hindsight can you see how the Hand of God helped through the process whether through other people or in a miraculous happenstance occurrence. Also in these difficult days is there someone you know facing difficulties where you can be the hand of Christ by helping in love?